Being at the Chart House made me feel as though I were in an old folks community in Florida. I’ve been to Florida once, it was actually the first state I stepped my little foot on. The family that adopted my family over from China are from Florida. I don’t remember the state much but it’s rummer that all old people go there to get away from us youngins. Life starts after 80 and it starts in Florida because it’s a geriatric haven there and here at the Chart House.

See what I mean, nothing but old people, everywhere, and not just old people, but rich old people. They sat us in the cocktail area, right next to a table of four, crazy old ladies day out. Watch out girls gone wild because these ladies were drinking and they were looking for a good time. But it was really uncomfortable because we were trapped in a corner table. The back of my chair was pinned up against another lady’s chair and every time I felt the urge to relax and lean back I hesitated because my back would rub up against hers.

Every time I go to a seafood place by the pier I can’t help but the get the urge to order clam chowder. I feel like if I love the clam chowder, I will more than likely love what’s coming next and if the clam chowder sucks dick cheese then chances are it will taste like dick cheese. The clam chowder cost $4.95 and sucked donkey dick. Great, check please! I didn’t get to taste a clam until I got half way through my soup. I didn’t really care for the flavor much, the potatoes were super mushy, and it looked a bit green, like celery chowder.

For appetizer we got the Hot Sampler, $18.95. It consists of cried chicken wings, fried zucchini, oyster rockefeller and calamari.

They oysters here were delicious, but this sauce they put with it was nasty as hell. It was super heavy, creamy and didn’t mix well with anything in your stomach.

These were the fried calamari and I didn’t care for them much either. The lady next to us seemed to take a liking to these though.

My favorite of the samplers were the fried zucchinis. The were delicious and cut the perfect width to where you get a proper amount of meat in each bite and it was cooked just right, not too mushy or raw. The grated parmeseam cheese on top was a nice touch.

I don’t know why we chose to order more but we did and we really shouldn’t have. This here is the Salmon Linguine, $10.95. As if the fried sampler platter didn’t make us feel like fat bastards enough; this plate really put us over the top. As you can see they didn’t put much care into the presentation of this dish at all. The bottom side of my dish was just bare dry noodles.

I think they cut up the salmon because it gives off the allusion that your getting more salmon than you think. I didn’t mind this because it guaranteed bits of salmon in every bite. The sauce was super rich, creamy and buttery in an instant heart attack kind of way.

Not a bad view during sunset.

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Chart House
1765 Ala Moana Blvd # 2
Honolulu, HI 96815

Get Directions(808) 941-6669