I’ve never been a fan of mochi ice cream. Why order this pathetic ball of an ice cream wrapped in doughy rice when I could have a full scoop of ice cream that will last way longer? While writing my last review on Bubbies I came across a few reviews that mentions how mind blowing their green tea mochi balls are. These people made it seem as though this little mochi ball had changed their lives. I couldn’t take it anymore. All of a sudden I felt imprisioned. Had I really been on the outside looking in this whole time. I wanted to be free from the rigid social conventions of plain rice and ice cream. Free me green mochi ball, free me! I fell to my knees and took a vow. Next time, little green tea mochi, next time it will be you, me and pure bliss. I promise you that!

Well next time came and my vow I kept. I ordered two because just ordering one is dumb. They had a nice selection of mochi to chose from. I picked green tea and red bean. It was served in a puny clear plastic cup and a little smaller than what I had expected. I don’t know why but for some reason I was expecting some abnormally large manufactured mochi ball. It was probably from all the hype that I read about them.

This is the red azuki bean mochi ball. I took a bite out of it so you can see that it’s red bean flavor all the way through, the mochi and the ice cream.

My green bean mochi statue.

These green tea balls won’t T-bag you.

My little sister from California ordered a scoop of ice cream in a large waffle cone.

When I tasted it my first reaction was, “I think there’s something wrong with the sherbert, like it went a little sour.” But then I saw the name, Rasberry Merlot Sherbert. Oh, o.k. merlot. Now it instantly tasted delightfully tart. I could really taste the strong pungent merlot, while the sweetness from the rasberry sherbert gave it this subtle yet refreshing taste. Good pick sis.

Overall I’m gonna have to give it up to Bubbies, pronounced boobies, I hope. The mochi balls were a delight. The thin layer of mochi embraced its cold creamy center allowing the ice cream to really take the stage and shine. The only way they could improve on this is to make these balls larger and we all can agree that there’s nothing wrong with big balls.

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After our usual morning swim, we cruised the streets of Kailua for some serious grub. I’m not picky, my rule of thumb is as long as I’ve never been before, I’m down for the cause, the hunger cause that is. None of us really had much of an opinion, so after no debate we ended up at New Chinese Garden Restaurant.

I wouldn’t expect anything less than red and golden colors at a Chinese restaurant.

Ray likes noodles so when I saw Shanghai Noodles, a noodle dish that I wasn’t familiar with I had no choice but to find out. First I asked the waitress what the Shanghai noodles were like. There was an obvious language barrier there so she held out her pen and said, “big, big.” Alright, I’m assuming that Shanghai noodles are round and as thick as her pen. Sweet, sounds good, we’ll take one of those. It cost $5.75 and came with cabbage, fungus, and really small pieces of pork. We didn’t realize it came with meat until halfway through the plate since the pork pieces were so small. We weren’t expecting any meat so I guess some is better than none. The noodles were a little mushy and it just tasted like everything was slapped together, microwaved, and brought out for our consumption and their profit.

I picked Combination Seafood with Mixed Vegetables on a Sizzling Platter, $8.50. Again, this dish was yet another disappointment. It didn’t taste old, but rather like it was made with no effort or care whatsoever. I mean, really, does this look like a sizzling platter to anyone? No sizzle at all. It was extremely dry for a Chinese dish, no gravy to be found, not even when we cleared the plate was there gravy.

Of course Chinese food just wouldn’t be the same without steamed white rice, .90 cents. These days Ray and I manage to share one bowl.

Overall I was not impressed with this place. Needless to say, I’m not coming back. Now, I don’t want to give off the impression that I had a horrible experience here. I was just disappointed. There’s far too many better places I have been and still yet to go.

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New Chinese Garden Restaurant
426 Uluniu Street
Kailua, HI
(808) 261-9345

While looking for parking at Kahala Mall I notice The Patisserie. Oh, my is that a bakery I see? A new day a new bakery I say. We already had our minds made up to dine at California Pizza Kitchen but I already had my mind made up that my dessert would be consumed here.

The Pattisserie is an unpretencious and clean bakery that also offers breakfast, sandwiches, salads, soup and of course, baked goods.

They have a nice selection of small pastries to choose from.

And cake as well.

I should warn you that hanging out with me is contagious and soon you will catch the sugar whore syndrome. It’s probably best that we keep our relationship on an internet relation basis only. Just moments after devouring a shitty excuse of a souffle at California Pizza Kitchen, Shane orders a cheese cake. That’s a dessert slut if I ever saw one.

Ray has this thing with apples in his dessert. Nothing wrong with that. I suppose it would make having dessert a little less sinful. He ordered a slice of Apple Pie.

This is my pick. I’m not sure what the exact name is. There was a solid thin layer of frosting on top that slightly cracked each time it was broken into. It was sweet like the cheap frosting you’d buy at a grocery store but since it was of a different texture and thin I found myself looking forward to it with each bite. The four walls of the cake was dry from being exposed too long.

Everything cost about $2.00 each. In my professional opinion this place was just mediocre. The cheese cake tasted like cheese cake, apple pie tasted like apple pie from a diner and my cake looked better than it tasted. I’m sure it would of been amazing fresh, but it wasn’t which is understandable for display purposes. Also, I just have high expectations when it comes to anything dessert.

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The Pattisserie
4211 Waialae Ave.
Honolulu, HI 96816
(808) 735-4402