Don’t judge me because of this blog. If you want to know the truth, I can’t stand McDonald’s. I don’t think anyone one should ever step foot in a fast food establishment. However there are exceptions. For example, when I traveled to China a few years back, I was a huge fan of McDonald’s; their #1 fan, I should of bought stock, I loved them so much. I didn’t necessarily go there for food, but more for their free facilities. Another acceptable reason for going into a fast food joint is when they offer new items, not a new double hamburger with special sauce, but more like new items that are only offered in that region. Which is my reason for going to this McDonald’s, the taro root pie.

For those of you that are not familiar with taro root, let me share some knowledge with you. Taro root is native to Asia and grown extensively in the Pacific. It’s commonly used in the Hawaiian dish, poi. Good-quality taro root will be firm, brown and have hairy roots and must be eaten cooked with the skins removed. Use in a wide array of dishes, taro root is available year-round. It contains no fat, no cholesterol, no sodium, has few calories, and is very starchy.

As for the taro root pie, it looks just like McDonald’s classic apple pie on the outside, but on the inside it looks like Barney took a big fat shit.

A lot of my friends don’t like taro root because the only time they ever had it was at a fake luau. where it was in the form of poi, which has been said to taste like glue. In truth, this wasn’t bad. It’s not something I would come back for seconds for but it served its purpose and filled my curiosity. I liked it, a little. I was surprised to see that it even resembled the picture.

Wow! Now that’s pretty fucking impressive.

The taro root pie cost me .99 cents and is not offered on the mainland, not that I’m aware of. Now, here’s my advice, you should make a day of it and head to Barnes and Nobles, buy Fast Food Nation, the book. If your not a fan of reading, it’s cool, rent it instead at the local video store, I suggest Diamond Head Video. Also while your at it rent Super Size Me. On the way home make a quick stop at McDonald’s and treat your self to something fantastic. Don’t forget to super size it!

As I mentioned before I only go to McDonald’s for their free facilities and food that’s only offered here and no where else. Pies must be an easy outlet for them to venture out and be creative. When I first saw McDonald’s marketing their new Haupia Pies for .99 cents I knew that one day I would have enough time, money and energy to go and pick one of these bad boys up and give it a whirl.

Now for those of you that don’t know what the heck a haupia is, no worries. Haupia just means coconut milk based. In most cases it comes in the form of gelatin, but it’s also enjoyed as a cream or custard filling as it is here.

Again, I hate to admit it but this was good. The outside crust was crispy and flaky while the haupia filling inside was creamy, a little lumpy, warm, and not too sweet. Man, I really wish I hated the shit out of these pies. Trust me I want to bash the hell out of McDonalds’, but honesty is my freaking policy. Hey don’t get me wrong now, this was for blog purposes only. The pie you see here is the first and last haupia pie I will ever eat.

I would give you directions, but what’s the point? There’s a McDonalds’ at every other corner of every street in the world. If you can’t find one you are stupid.

This is my new favorite place to go to in North Shore. It’s called the Grass Skirt. The only thing that they need improvement on is the service, but other than that everything is spectacular. I love the ambiance, decor, location and, most importantly, the food.

The Grass Skirt is a petite yet inviting place. The walls are polished with a chic, stylish, Hawaiian attitude. The menu is printed on a surf board and hung from the ceiling. We ordered, paid, then grabbed a table and waited. There’s a few tables inside, chairs next to a counter and more tables set up outside as well.

I ordered the BBQ Pulled Pork. I ordered this plate the last time I was here and I don’t usually order the same thing twice, but Oh My God. I do make exceptions when the food was really, really cheap or really really good. In this case the food was really, really a gift from the Heavens above. The BBQ Pulled Pork is roasted and shredded mixed with a sweet and spicy BBQ sauce. It was $8.95. They were generous with their portions so $8.95 is totally worth it. I ended up taking half of this home.

This is the Grilled Ahi. It’s an 8 oz Ahi fillet grilled and topped with basil and lemon butter for $10.95. Not only do they give heaping portions, but you gotta admit the presentation is flawless, especially for being served on a paper plate. Ray has a healthy appetite and he was only able to eat 2/3 of his plate. We left the rest because he’s not a fan of left overs and I’m not a fan of left over seafood.

Shane couldn’t decide so he got two things. This Hot Dog was 1/4 lbs and cost $2.95. They split the weinner in half, grilled it and squeezed ketchep and mustard in the middle. I’ve never seen it serve this way and thought it was kinda different and cool. I asked him if it was better than Costco’s Hot Dog. The look on his face said, “by far.” Sorry Costco but there’s a new dog in town.

In addition to his hot dog Shane also got a Pulled Pork Sandwich. It was served with lettuce, tomato and onions for $6.95. Shane ate everything and we left totally blissed out of our minds. What a great find.

My only complaint was that there was no dessert on the menu.

Since this last post Grass Skirt Grill has become one of my favorite spots to visit. My little sister came over on vacation a couple weeks ago and of course I had to take her here.

Here she is, doesn’t she look excited to eat!

My sister, Selena, is one of those extremely picky and healthy eaters. It’s almost to the point where going out to eat could be a bit of a nuisance because she always orders everything on the side, and substitutes this for that and did I mention she makes her own lemonade at the table, not because she’s cheap, but because she prefers the fake sugar at the table and not the real stuff. Anyway, we decided to share the Grilled Fish Salad, $12.95. Selena orders the dressing on the side just in case she doesn’t like it. When she goes to the counter to pick up our salad it was covered in papaya dressing. Selena goes, “oh, I ordered the dressing on the side.” And the stupid bitch behind the counter goes, “oh, well, there’s not much of it, you’ll be alright.” Selena comes back to the table upset and disappointed.

Now does this look like a little dressing to anyone? There’s a pool of it gathering at the bottom of our plate. Now, it really didn’t bother me, since I know I like the dressing, and it turns out Selena did too, but had it been me that picked up the salad and that bitch would of said that to me I would of said, “well, I’m allergic to papaya dressing so I won’t be o.k. Will you guys be o.k. with a lawsuit on your hands?” Point is, it’s not cool to be talked down to, especially when your a loyal customer. Wow, this place really sucks bad when it comes to customer service. All I know is that next time I make it out this far to get some food, it wont be at the Grass Skirt Grill. But just to be completely honest, the salad was really good.

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Grass Skirt Grill
66-214 Kamehameha Hwy
Haleiwa, HI 96712

Get Directions(808) 637-4852