That’s a pretty ballsy name for a taco shop. I remember being referred to this place awhile back and every time we drive by we’re on our way home and say, “oh well, next time we’ll just have to see.” Well, next time finally came and it was time to see if killer taco was to die for.

From the outside the place looks like a dine in restaurant. Being waited on sounds just about right after a long day at the beach.

Ah, dang-it! We were fooled by those dark tinted windows. You mean I have to go up to the counter and order there. Oh, alright, but no tip for you.

Ray ordered a burrito, as usual. I don’t know, the man likes his burritos. I guess you can’t say anything since he’s Mexican. But for once I dare you to order a taco man, no not the pink taco, the Mexican cooked kind you dirty bastard. Ah, forget it. Get a bloody burrito.

He got the Long Board Burrito, $5.49. It came with rice, refried or black beans, choice of meat, cheese, salsa, sour cream and guacamole. As you can see the burrito was a bloody mess. The making of the burrito was poor. I can’t say that this was Ray’s worst burrito, since he’s had so many, the odds are in their favor. But I can say it was a bitch to hear him wine about it throughout lunch. “It’s so soggy. This shit is mushy, My burrito is falling apart. This taste like shit.” Oh, my God, dude, did your dick just start bleeding. Maybe you should stick a Q-tip up that thing and just shut the fuck up so I can eat my food in peace.

I ordered two chicken tacos, one crispy and one soft. They came with the usual, cheese, lettuce, salsa and choice of meat; I chose chicken. The hard taco was $2.19 and the soft was $2.29.

Uh, did someone forget the chicken? Seriously, what am I paying for, a taco shell and scraps of rabbit food.

My soft taco was served and wrapped up in aluminum tin foil. I’m gonna just go ahead and say this was a bit irritating. It probably wouldn’t have annoyed me as much if I didn’t hate my crispy taco, or if Ray had not been at my side bitching about his meal the whole time. So when it came time to eat my soft taco, I think I had already prejudged it.

But it doesn’t change the fact that this taco really was a piece of shit. This is a really sad soft taco. It was a soggy, mushy mess. I ate my flaccid taco and Ray and I quickly headed out.

Maybe we just got them on a bad day, who knows. But with so many great restaurants near by, I don’t think they’ll be seeing me for a while. Click below for directions
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Killer Tacos
66-560 Kamehameha Hwy
Haleiwa, HI 96712

Get Directions(808) 637-4573

I ordered Italian Sandwich, $6.95. It came with molinari Italian salami pepperoni, ham, provolone cheese, lettuce, tomato, mayo and Italian dressing. They don’t have combo meals so I was forced to order everything ala cart. I got a bag of chips, $1.75 and a medium sprite for, $1. 50 to share with my honey.

The whole meal was fabulous. It was a really good sandwich in every way but size. I don’t recommend sharing this if your hungry. It was just enough to fill us up but leave us hungry for more in another hour. Which I guess isn’t so bad since it’s better to eat more meals at smaller portions throughout the day.

Another great thing I love about this place is that they are locally owned and work with local farmers. I support supporting local farmers.

Aloha Salads is right next door to Gourmet Express which also has really good food.

click below for directions

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Kahala Mall
4211 Waialae Avenue
Honolulu, HI 96816
808 735-8334
10:00 AM-9 PM Daily

If your down in Waikiki the International Food Court is probably one of your best bet for fast, affordable food. It’s tucked away between Kuhio and Kalakowa. The picture above is through the side entrance. One of the things I like about the International Food Court is the variety of food that’s offered. Say your in the mood for Chinese, and somebody else wants Korean, and then someone else just wants some ice cream, the International Food Court can make that happen. It’s a beautiful thing. Also, I don’t know about you guys, but I’m a fan of food photos that show you what you will be ordering. Most places here have photos of their food and you place your order by the number system. Photo #1 is order #1, photo #2 is order #2, you get my point. I wish more places would work this way. Pomai from The Tasty Island agrees with me and also mentioned the number system in a recently post on Bob’s.

Lots of outside seating to choose from

I’m a strong supporter of Vietnamese food so Saigon Express is where I tend to pick when I come here.

I got the Look Funn Steamed Pork, $7.00 and #23. My meal was served in a plastic bowl and it came with fish sauce to pour over or dip. I really enjoyed this dish and only wish they had given me more carrots and radishes, oh, and onions. I had to ask for the mint; the photo had it but my dish lacked it. My noodles, or look funn were soft and tasted perfect with the steamed pork. It was a very light dish that didn’t give me constipation, gas, bloating, diarehha, or make me feel like a glutton.

If the Look Fun wasn’t really your thing, then the Shrimp Pad Thai might be, $8.50 and #19 on the menu. This is what my friend Shane’s ordered. I tasted it and it was amazing, but when I looked at it I told him it looked like it had a lot of bean sprouts. He said it didn’t taste that way at all and it didn’t to me either.

Yes there’s another Greek place on the island and it’s located inside the International Market. I think it’s called the Greek Grill, but there’s not really a header above it’s place. This is usually Ray’s pick. He’s a fan of eating cute biblical animals like lamb on a soft warm pita bread.

God must of needed some lambs today because there seemed to be a shortage in Ray’s gyro. He gets this every time he comes here and we remember it being a lot more meaty.

And it was really creamy today. Sheesh, Not a lot of love today, but thankfully just as good as he remembered. And 10 minutes after eating, Ray breaks out into a sweat, another party gone wrong in his pants and he’s left in explosive asshole agony once again. I’m not saying this to deter you from coming here, my honey is just a bit sensitive to cream, or maybe God has a sense of humor after all.

For directions click below
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International Market Place
2330 Kalakaua Ave # 200
Honolulu, HI 96815

Get Directions(808) 971-2080