I can’t tell you how many times I’ve driven past this place thinking it was one of the cutest little restaurant in Chinatown. I don’t know if you guys have ever been to Chinatown or not, but it seems as though any Chinatown you go to, doesn’t matter what city or state, but they’re always super crowded and filthy. So when there’s a cute restaurant that looks inviting it tends to stand out a bit and that’s exactly the place that Little Village is. I’m a bit annoyed that I forgot to take a photo of the outside but here’s the view from outside the restroom.

I came here after work and it was a pretty shitty day at the office so I decided to splurge on a couple of dishes to make up for it. I ordered with the Spicy Garlic Shrimp, $13.95. There definitely was a lot of garlic to this dish, but as a whole it really didn’t do it for me. It wasn’t bad by any means, and I think the ambiance made me think I enjoyed the dish more than I really did. The texture of the sauce tasted and reminded me of the Thai sweet spicy sauce. I have to say, it was just boring in flavor.

I also ordered half a Peking Duck, $17.00. It came with small white buns to wrap around. If your a chicken and biscuit type of gal, or guy, and you like duck then you love these.

The waiter came and proceeded to insert pieces of the duck, and duck skin into all the buns. This was entirely too much work for him and required too much patience on my end, no thanks I’ll do it myself, thank you.

The crispy duck skin was served on top of fresh, crispy shrimp chips. I like laying the chips on the tongue until I feel it sizzle. A thing I use to do as a child and I like to keep the tradition alive. As for the duck skin, uhh, not a fan. My parents think I’m crazy for never eating duck skin, or the skin of any animal for that matter. I guess it’s unheard of for a Chinese to not eat duck skin. I mine as well not eat chicken feet, uh wait, I don’t. Sorry mom. Eating duck skin is no different from eating crispy chicken skin, if you like that then I promise you you’ll be happy with duck skin. It really adds more flavor to the whole duck and bun experience.

My favorite was the lettuce wraps, $7.95. This was probably one of the better lettuce wraps I’ve had. Definitely better than PF Changs and Brew Moon. My friend was like, “what is this again because I would totally order just this next time.” It wasn’t too salty, like PF Changs and had way more flavor than Brew Moon. I loved loved the chopped up black mushrooms and crunch from the water chestnuts.

Alright guys, there you go. Overall, I would definitely say this place was worth coming to. Stay away from the garlic shrimp and don’t leave without the lettuce wraps.

For directions click below,
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Little Village
1113 Smith St
Honolulu, HI 96817

Get Directions(808) 545-3008

If your down in Waikiki the International Food Court is probably one of your best bet for fast, affordable food. It’s tucked away between Kuhio and Kalakowa. The picture above is through the side entrance. One of the things I like about the International Food Court is the variety of food that’s offered. Say your in the mood for Chinese, and somebody else wants Korean, and then someone else just wants some ice cream, the International Food Court can make that happen. It’s a beautiful thing. Also, I don’t know about you guys, but I’m a fan of food photos that show you what you will be ordering. Most places here have photos of their food and you place your order by the number system. Photo #1 is order #1, photo #2 is order #2, you get my point. I wish more places would work this way. Pomai from The Tasty Island agrees with me and also mentioned the number system in a recently post on Bob’s.

Lots of outside seating to choose from

I’m a strong supporter of Vietnamese food so Saigon Express is where I tend to pick when I come here.

I got the Look Funn Steamed Pork, $7.00 and #23. My meal was served in a plastic bowl and it came with fish sauce to pour over or dip. I really enjoyed this dish and only wish they had given me more carrots and radishes, oh, and onions. I had to ask for the mint; the photo had it but my dish lacked it. My noodles, or look funn were soft and tasted perfect with the steamed pork. It was a very light dish that didn’t give me constipation, gas, bloating, diarehha, or make me feel like a glutton.

If the Look Fun wasn’t really your thing, then the Shrimp Pad Thai might be, $8.50 and #19 on the menu. This is what my friend Shane’s ordered. I tasted it and it was amazing, but when I looked at it I told him it looked like it had a lot of bean sprouts. He said it didn’t taste that way at all and it didn’t to me either.

Yes there’s another Greek place on the island and it’s located inside the International Market. I think it’s called the Greek Grill, but there’s not really a header above it’s place. This is usually Ray’s pick. He’s a fan of eating cute biblical animals like lamb on a soft warm pita bread.

God must of needed some lambs today because there seemed to be a shortage in Ray’s gyro. He gets this every time he comes here and we remember it being a lot more meaty.

And it was really creamy today. Sheesh, Not a lot of love today, but thankfully just as good as he remembered. And 10 minutes after eating, Ray breaks out into a sweat, another party gone wrong in his pants and he’s left in explosive asshole agony once again. I’m not saying this to deter you from coming here, my honey is just a bit sensitive to cream, or maybe God has a sense of humor after all.

For directions click below
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International Market Place
2330 Kalakaua Ave # 200
Honolulu, HI 96815

Get Directions(808) 971-2080

Located along the strip of Ala Moana Bombay is probably the first Indian restaurant that tourist encounter. When I first moved here I was thrilled to see an Indian restaurant so close to my home. However, after scanning their menu and checking out the prices I quickly turned around and headed straight out the door. A year later after becoming slightly numb with the bull shit prices around here I decided to give Bombay another shot.

The restaurant is nicely lit with dim lighting. To me this is probably the larger and nicer of the Indian restaurants on the island.

This is Gulab Jamun, $4.95. I saw it on the menu and quickly recognized it as one of my all time favorite Indian treats, grated carrot dessert flavored with rosewater and cardamom and enriched with pistachios and raisins. The thing with Indian desserts is that I could seriously eat all of it in one bite, no joke. It’s always very disappointing, which is exactly how I would describe this dessert. It was very greasy. If I pressed down on it with my spoon long enough, oil would ooze to the top. Along with that it was just overall boring and bland.

We ordered Garlic Nan to go along with our meal, $3.50.

Ray and I shared the Lamb Rogan Josh, $15.95. The menu says it’s tender peeces of boneless fresh lamb cooked in a yogurt based creamy curry sauce, enriched with a select blend of spices, chef’s special. My picture makes the meal look larger than it really was. The scoop of rice was puny, not even enough for one. The lamb was delicious, but for sixteen bucks I didn’t get much of it, just a lot of sauce in a bowl. It seemed more like soup than a dish, and even came with a spoon.

For our dessert I ordered the rice pudding, $3.95. Don’t let my amazing photo skills fool you, the pudding is way smaller than it appears in real life. This was just a close up shot. All of it could of easily fit on a medium size ladle. Like I said before, for some reason Indian dessert is always freaking tiny. Me, being a dessert whore, is a little bitter about this.

Bombay is definitely a place that doesn’t like to give you your money’s worth. The food is forgettable, service was pretty boring and portions are small.

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Bombay Indian Restaurant
1778 Ala Moana Blvd
Honlulu, HI 96815

Get Directions(808) 942-3990

You know, every so often when the moon is full, the stars are bright and all the planets are perfectly align I feel like being treated to a nice dinner. I had never heard of Tanaka of Tokyo before. Shane said it was like a Benihana’s in the sense that it’s totally table side service and all the food is prepared right there in front of you.

Luckily Ray was smart enough to make reservations. There was a small wait when we got there and then we were escorted to the inner cavity of the restaurant where I all the action went down. It was like we went straight to an underground gambling casino. The place was dark with not a lot of decor on the walls just a bunch of Asians sitting around a large round table, waiting to be dealt out some serious food. The chef puts on a show deals out the food and then, next round of food, deals it out and so on. There were lots of Asians, and commotion going on. Yeah, like I said, It definitely felt like we just stepped into a secret underground casino. How exciting is that.

Everyone is started off with a salad. I suggest you ask for the dressing on the side. No dressing is better than whatever it is that they are using. Even I, the salad whore, could not eat this, pat-tuey. I also ordered a tropical drink, to the right of my salad. It comes with the glass but no worries, a clean one is given to you at the end of the meal so you don’t have to take home a dirty one. Cheers!

This was our chef. Since this was table side service putting on a big show and making your guest laugh is key.

The food, the food, the food is on fire, we don’t give a fuck let the mother fucker burn, burn . . . Just having a little fun.

I don’t remembered exactly what we ordered but I can tell you it was two combination seafood deals at about $40.00-$50.00 each. So this is how it went down, were sat at a round table with strangers. You can make nice with them or ignore them, either way, your sitting with them. We threw everyone a smile and nodded to let them know we were friendly but for the most part we ignored them and they ignored us, this is probably due to the fact that we don’t speak Japanese and like all Japanese they pretend not to speak English. Waiter comes by to takes everyone’s order. Since I’m so use to sharing I was like, “we’ll order this now and if were still hungry we’ll get more later. ” “Uh, yeah, it’s not sushi honey, you have to order everything now,” Ray informs me. He was right, you have to order everything at once, the chef then is given the list and collects all his raw materials in the back, brings it to the table, then kindly introduces himself. When the chef returns everybody shuts the fuck up because we know at places like this it’s more about the show than it is about the food.

Everyone must of ordered the same damn thing because everything our master teppan-yaki chef prepared was dealt out to everyone. He better not be giving our food to everybody else, and if he is he better give us some of their food because sharing is caring bitches. I don’t care if you have a chef knife in your hand I will Shang-hi your ass.

At the end of the meal we were given a choice of green tea, vanilla or chocolate ice-cream to choose from. I got green tea and my honey got vanilla. The green tea was definitely better than the vanilla but my honey begged to differ, which was fine because I didn’t want to share any of it. Overall I am quite pleased with my experience here. The chef was skillful at presenting the food with great flair. Sometimes it’s wise to throw the cheap card out the door.

I forgot to mention that at the beginning of dinner a photographer comes over to the table and takes group photos of everyone. “What the fuck, I’m role playing here and I don’t want evidence of me up in a secret underground casino you dumb fuck, what do you think this is Disney Land? Fuck off,” I gave the photographer my best poker face and kindly took the photo anyway. At the end of dinner he comes back and distributes the freshly developed photos to each group. As he handed me our photo I did what any respected cheap ass would of done if they were in my shoes, I whipped out my camera with a quickness and with the skill of a nimble ninja took a photo of a photo. That’s right bitches, I still had my cheap card the whole time.

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Tanaka of Tokyo
131 Kaiulani Ave
Honolulu, HI 96815

Get Directions(808) 922-4233

Here are some photos I’ve found of my last trip to the Golden Palace.

I know this looks a bit slimy, but it was more silky than slimy, chicken wrapped in won ton skins with gravy

This was my least favorite. The inside was filled with way too much mochi and very doughy.

I still think it’s crazy when I tell my friends about dim sum and they’re like, “dim what?” I was brought up eating this stuff and I’ll never get tired of it. Where else are you able to sample little bits of everything without breaking your wallet? As a matter of fact, dim sum has been probably one of the cheapest, most fulling meals for me. When Ray and I go I don’t think we ever spend more than $15.00. What a steal.

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Golden Palace
111 N King St
Honolulu, HI 96817

Get Directions(808) 521-8268

Searching for a good Vietnamese restaurant? With so many to choose from where should one start? I’ll tell you where, Pho To-Chau, that’s where. Word on the street is Pho To-Chau is the place, and when I say “the place” I mean “the place” to go for some really good pho. This place lies at the boarder of China Town and I don’t know if you guys have noticed or not but this place is popping. Every morning there’s a line streaming out it’s door that puts Studio 54 in 1977 to shame. Seriously, there’s always a crazy line and not only that but this place is sandwiched between two other Vietnamese Restaurants that seem vacant; no way, they’re open, I couldn’t tell.

So I mentioned it to one of my co-workers and she goes, “oh girl, this place is the shit, I use to go every Monday with my ex. They have the best pho on the island.” Really? Best pho huh? I’ll be the judge of that.

This is the line we walked up to. It was about a 30 minute wait.

This place had two rooms, roughly about the same size and was packed. I think I saw a total of three female workers. One was the waitress/host, another was the cook/waitress, and then the busser.

It didn’t surprise me to see that service sucked ass, but this place isn’t known for their stellar service. Actually, I thought it was a bit amusing. First one lady comes and takes our drink order, “what do you want to drink?” I order the iced coffee with condensed milk, $2.75 and Ray gets some water. She walks away, no thank you or smile, just completely emotionless. No one should ever get offended or upset over service like this, especially if it’s a hole in the wall and especially if it’s an Asian establishment. Old school Asians, particularly the Chinese/Vietnamese don’t really understand customer service, that’s not their business. Their business is pho, at least it is in this case and it’s about working as efficiently and productively as possible to get you your pho and make them money. At places like this tips stand for, To Insure Prompt Service, so if you get prompt service you should still tip well. Alright back to my coffee, if your a lover of coffee I highly recommend iced coffee with condensed milk from a Vietnamese restaurant. It usually comes out hot and compressed in a dripper with an extra cup of ice on the side. At the bottom of the ice is condensed milk. After the coffee is done dripping you dump it over the ice and mix. It’s sweet and strong and has the best coffee flavor ever. I love love this stuff.

They brought us a pitcher of water because obviously they weren’t planning on coming back to refill.

We ordered spring rolls for appetizer, $3.75, shrimp, pork, fresh herbs, vermicelli rolled in rice paper with special sauce. Each roll was cut up in four pieces each and were nicely and tightly roll. I didn’t like that they were cut in so many pieces. It made me feel like I was eating sushi. I prefer the traditional half cut.

Fuck, I got so excited when I got my pho that I forgot to take a picture right away. It didn’t come so green with basil and mint, that’s just how I like mine. In my opinion the soup is what makes the pho. A lot of people don’t even pay attention to the soup. When I get my pho, the first thing I do before I fuck with it is taste the soup, this lets me know how much I will be enjoying my meal. I loved the soup here. It was really authentic and hearty in flavor. I could tell that the soup was made from scratch and with real beef bones. I was so excited, I knew this was going to be a really good meal. I can’t tell you how much meat they put in here. Wow, these ladies don’t skimp on the meat at all. When I ordered my food they asked if I wanted my meat separate, which means raw on the side, or in my soup. I’m not really of fan of raw meat so I said in the soup. I did see them serve the meat raw on a separate plate to another table and the meat looked really good and fresh to me. It was nicely cut with good color. I was impressed. But the one thing I wasn’t impressed with was the beef ball. I love beef balls and the balls here suck, but they made up for it in everything else.

The pho came with plenty of basil. I love basil. After our lunch I boxed the rest of it up for later. They charge .25 cents for a to go box. Whatever, it’s a quarter and lunch was pretty cheap. When I had my leftovers later I was still so surprised to see how much meat was still left. I haven’t been to a lot of pho restaurants on this island but I think my friend is right, Pho To-Chau has to have the best pho on the island.

This was the line when we left. I guess I’m not the first to discover this place. If you decide to come here, come early or be patient. Also they have weird business hours, They are only open for lunch and close at 2:30.  By the way, the pho cost $6.95.  What a deal.

Pho To-Chau

At the corner of River and N. King.

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Pho To-Chau
1007 River St
Honolulu, HI 96817

Get Directions(808) 533-4549

Mikawon is somewhat hidden in the walls of Waikiki. Ray suggested this place which was a surprise since he’s never really suggests Korean. Of course I had to jump on the opportunity.

When we walked in I couldn’t help but it feel a sense of deja vu. Have I been here before? In a dream? A past life? Ah, oh well, lets eat.

We noticed on the way in a picture of a lunch special for $9.00 in the window. It looked like a decent amount of food at a fair price so we decided to give to a shot. Basically, you get BBQ beef, chicken, a dumpling, an egg patty and four sides along with rice. Yeah, I thought it was a nice deal too and as you can see from the picture it was a good amount too.

For my sides I picked tofu, kim chee, seaweed, and glass noodles, all of it came cold. I picked the sides and waited a bit for them to cook the meat in the back. The tofu was solid and tasty, the kim chee was a tad too salty, the seaweed was too seaweedy, if that makes sense, and the glass noodles were really good. The meat was like Yummies good. I liked it but that was the extent of it. There was no love involved.

These noodles were the bomb. It was the only side that we really like and of course it had to be the skimpiest. This is a close up of it and I think we were able to get a bite out of it each. It had a subtle sweet and peppery flavor. Ray was like, how come you didn’t get more of this and less of the other stuff.

The place is covered with drawings and pictures from visitors from all over. Here’s one I found that I wanted to share.

I had to take this one for Ray, since he’s Mexican. I just had to translate it for him since he doesn’t speak or read it.

Anyhow, a few days later I was going through some of my photos and what do I see, a picture of me and my friend Cammie here. We were on vacation in 2005. Haha, I knew I had been here before.

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Mikawon Korean Restaurant
2345 Kuhio Ave
Honolulu, HI 96815

Get Directions(808) 924-3277

So after Cake Culture Cupcakes we decided to stay in the Aina Haina Shopping Center Courtyard and find some place eat. We spotted Komakata Japanese Restaurant and headed that way to give it a try.

The inside was quite spacious. Lots of table seating on this side of the restaurant and the other. We came at the perfect time because there were only a few tables being used but by the time we ordered our food most of the tables were occupied.

After skimming the menu Ray and I decided on the Combination Dinner, $20.50. We got to pick two items from the list of sashimi, katsu, teriyaki chicken or beef, butterfish misoni, ahi teriyaki, tempura and sushi mix. We picked sushi mix and sashimi. The meal also came with rice, miso, soup, tsukemono, tobachi and salad.

Honestly, I don’t really know what tsukemono, tobachi is but I’m guessing it’s one of these. This is what our meal started out with and this is probably why Japanesies are so damn skinny. I don’t know the proper terminology but I call this poke, pickled radish, and pickled cabbage. Everything was good, but I could seriously eat this in under a minute and that’s not sharing. I guess this is where I practice chewing my food, enjoying one another’s company and patience. It was all fresh and yummy.

Soon salad and miso soup followed. Again the salad portion was a disgrace. The picture really makes it look big because it so wasn’t. We got one slice of tomato, one cucumber slice and a layer of mixed greens. The bowl came to us a quarter full. I think they should pick smaller bowls for the salad so it at least doesn’t look so skimpy.

One of the reasons why I love miso soup is because no matter where you order it it comes out piping hot, not warm hot but hot hot. It’s so nice because it instantly warms your tummy. Miso soup is definitely comfort food for the soul.

Here is our sushi mix. As you can see it’s a lot like a rainbow roll, sorta, just not rolled but you know what I mean. It tasted the way it looks, fresh and very satisfying. I love ginger, especially the yellow kind over the pink kind because it makes me feel like it hasn’t been tampered with and that’s the kind it came with.

Our sashimi was an absolute delight. As you can see from the picture it had a vibrant pink to it and was cut in the perfect bite sizes.

If this picture doesn’t want to make you go out and get some sashimi then I have failed you.

The meal also came with a small bowl of rice. Luckily Ray and I don’t eat that much rice because the bowl of rice was really small as well, like smaller than most small bowls of rice. Anyhow, for 20 bucks for all that food I don’t know if it makes it into my, “cheap places to eat” category. I’m gonna have to move on.

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Komakata Japanese Restaurant
820 W Hind Dr # 102
Honolulu, HI 96821

Get Directions(808) 377-5700p

Located right below Irish Rose, one of the best local bars on the island Pho Minh Thu would make great drunk food if only they were open till the wee hours of the night. A bunch of my friends come here often because it’s convienent and according to them, really good. Well as always I had to see for myself.

Inside Pho Minh Thu was about eight covered tables. There was only one other table besides ours, which usually means a short wait will follow.

It’s just hard not to start off with Summer Rolls. They’re just so good and the perfect appetizer to start off with since they’re light, refreshing and so darn good. These were $3.95 for two. I liked that the shrimp were bright pink because it meant that the shrimp was cooked well, which for me is a good thing.

Listed under the Vegetarian Section of the Menu was these Garden Rolls, $3.95, aka, Tofu Rolls. If your vegetarian or a lover of tofu I highly suggest these. They were just like the summer rolls but with tofu. The tofu still had the skin around and was cut just thick enough to where you can really taste the tofu but it wasn’t overwhelming.

I ordered the Tofu & Green Papaya Salad, $5.95. I guess tofu just sounded good today. The tofu was good, and everything tasted really fresh, but the papaya was shredded a little too thin for my liking. I love basil so it was nice to see it topped with lots of it.

Ray ordered the combination shrimp and chicken fried rice, $5.95. This was a little on the boring side. It lacked flavor. They gave us the small shrimp, which would of been o.k. if more were given. These are the small shrimp, so I know they’re really inexpensive. Also, we didn’t realize there was any chicken in there until we took a closer look.

See, there it is. I took a picture of it next to my fork so you guys have an idea of how small the shrimp and chicken pieces really were.

I would come back for the tofu rolls. Those were a winner in my book. I don’t know why more places don’t offer them. I would think they would be a better investment than the traditional summer rolls. Everything else was mediocre.

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Pho Minh Thu
478 Ena Rd
Honolulu, HI 96815

Get Directions(808) 946-2299

Wild Ginger had their grand opening back in November. I didn’t get a chance to make it but I did make it a few days after and boy I gotta tell you this place is good.

The inside is roomy so accommodating larges parties I wouldn’t think would be a problem. Everything looks clean and fresh, the way a new restaurant should look.

After ordering they brought us a small dish of pickled sweet and sour veggies. I loved this stuff. It was slightly sweet, slightly sour and crispy. It was a perfect appetizer to wake up my taste buds for more tantalizing dishes.

For starters we ordered Vietnamese Summer Rolls, $6.00. It came with four pieces, or two rolls cut in half. If you look closer you can see big chunks of seafood. The rolls were topped with seaweed and radishes.

Selena ordered the Vietnamese Salad, $6.00. Being the picky person that she is she ordered the dressing on the side. It was our server’s first day of work and she forgot to tell them to leave the dressing off. She felt really bad and it really wasn’t a big deal. After that the cook and manager, everyone kept coming up to our table asking how everything was, if we needed anything, more water, rice, a foot rub? Everyone was so nice but so there in your face. As soon as we finish swallowing someone new was there at our table happily ready it get us whatever our hearts desire. Everything’s great, food’s fantastic and service is a little over the top. We just want to eat our food in peace people. Leave us alone! Please, leave us alone. Anyhow, the salad was delish. Really fresh and crisp, slightly sweet and nutty.

We tried to get dishes that we all could enjoy. This is the Yaki Soba Dish with Chicken, $8.00. It was garnished with a ginger. I don’t really think that ginger was the best garnish for it but whatever, it’s garnish right? The noodles had great flavor. They weren’t skimpy on the chicken either. Extra hint of veggies made for a crisp bite every time. There’s nothing I would change about this one.

And here is the dish that tied everything together. This is where all the magic happened, the Steam XO Sea Bass, $15.50. It was a sea bass fillet steamed in XO sauce and served with fresh veggies. This dish is one of those dishes you would have a personal chef prepare for you when your still trying to be healthy. I don’t know what XO sauce is but I’m a fan. I always thought that XOXO meant hugs and kisses so maybe it’s just sauce that’s made with love. Works for me. The fish was tender and flaky and tasted so good. I think everyone could agree that this was the best dish.

There you have it folks. Another great find. Now I know this place isn’t the icon for cheap places, but It’s somewhat affordable. So if you feel like treating someone you love to a nice meal this would be the place. Like I said, service was a little over the top, but I think it had something to do with just opening up and trying to make sure everyone had a great experience. Overall I have to say we all did. At the end of our meal, the manager gave us 25% off our check for the inconvenience of the dressing on the salad. It wasn’t a big deal, but I’m never going to fight a discount. So in the end, for us, it was a cheap place to eat.

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Wild Ginger
3441 Waialae Ave.
Honolulu, HI 96816
808 738-1168

After our usual morning swim, we cruised the streets of Kailua for some serious grub. I’m not picky, my rule of thumb is as long as I’ve never been before, I’m down for the cause, the hunger cause that is. None of us really had much of an opinion, so after no debate we ended up at New Chinese Garden Restaurant.

I wouldn’t expect anything less than red and golden colors at a Chinese restaurant.

Ray likes noodles so when I saw Shanghai Noodles, a noodle dish that I wasn’t familiar with I had no choice but to find out. First I asked the waitress what the Shanghai noodles were like. There was an obvious language barrier there so she held out her pen and said, “big, big.” Alright, I’m assuming that Shanghai noodles are round and as thick as her pen. Sweet, sounds good, we’ll take one of those. It cost $5.75 and came with cabbage, fungus, and really small pieces of pork. We didn’t realize it came with meat until halfway through the plate since the pork pieces were so small. We weren’t expecting any meat so I guess some is better than none. The noodles were a little mushy and it just tasted like everything was slapped together, microwaved, and brought out for our consumption and their profit.

I picked Combination Seafood with Mixed Vegetables on a Sizzling Platter, $8.50. Again, this dish was yet another disappointment. It didn’t taste old, but rather like it was made with no effort or care whatsoever. I mean, really, does this look like a sizzling platter to anyone? No sizzle at all. It was extremely dry for a Chinese dish, no gravy to be found, not even when we cleared the plate was there gravy.

Of course Chinese food just wouldn’t be the same without steamed white rice, .90 cents. These days Ray and I manage to share one bowl.

Overall I was not impressed with this place. Needless to say, I’m not coming back. Now, I don’t want to give off the impression that I had a horrible experience here. I was just disappointed. There’s far too many better places I have been and still yet to go.

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New Chinese Garden Restaurant
426 Uluniu Street
Kailua, HI
(808) 261-9345

The Golden Duck is a great neighborhood restaurant to get Chinese food at a fair price.

Half of the restaurant looks like an old diner.

And the other half looks like an old restaurant.

We started off with Crispy Gau Gee (8 pieces), $5.25. These little fritters were tasty, but not amazing. I like that it came with 8 pieces so each of us were allowed two each. It didn’t come with sweet and sour sauce, so remember to ask for it because it makes these things much tastier.

It was a basic won ton wrapped around pork meat.

Justin ordered the Chicken with Honey Glazed Walnut, $8.75. In my opinion this dish is like Orange Chicken, the first bite or two is always amazing but after that my palate gets bored and I find myself eating something else. I’ve tasted many Honey Glazed Walnuts and I do want to say that this is the best I’ve had, but it doesn’t change the fact that after the second bite, I had enough and was pleased to see more food on the lazy Susan to spin my way.

The famous Mongolian Beef, $7.95. The flavor was good but the beef was a little chewy. I’m not a fan of the rice noodle styrofoam things underneath. They serve no purpose except to make consumers think they have been given more food than what they were actually given.

This was Shane’s order, Chicken Fried Rice, $6.50. If you love peas, this is the fried rice for you. It was totally overloaded with peas. I’m a fan of peas, so it didn’t bother me, however, everyone at the table said the same thing, “way too much peas.” Besides the peas, the flavor was right on, but the chicken was scarce. More chicken, less peas and it would of been fabulous.

One thing I like about having Chinese food is that food is brought to you as soon as it’s made since it’s family style. The foods piping hot and everyone gets to eat. However, we go the first two dishes and when we were all done eating, I had to remind them that we were still waiting on one more dish. Oh well.

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Golden Duck
1221 South King Street
Honolulu, HI 96814
(808) 597-8088

Is it just me or does food from a food court located inside a mall never sound enticing? It seems like it’s just fuel to keep the shopping energy flowing. Anyway, it seems like I go through the same routine everytime I end up eating at the mall, I take a full walk through just to end up getting Thai. I’ve had their papaya salad twice so far and I’m a fan. Though, both times I’ve forgotten my camera, but trust me it’s good. They ask you if you want it spicy, medium or mild. Their spicy is really really spicy, so I suggest to go medium, which I did and was still slightly too spicy. It’s made fresh right in front of you.

Now, not every thing is good there. They have this crushed ice dessert that sucks donkey dick.

Looks good right. When I saw this I thought it was shaved ice with coconut milk and a variety of toppings to choose from to top it off. Finally, more toppings to choose from, I was so excited. Not that I don’t love shaved ice, but it seems like all they have for toppings is the usual azuki beans. Don’t get me wrong, I love azuki beans, especially on my shaved ice, but I also love my variety. Well, I should of took this ad literal. It wasn’t shaved ice, but crushed ice. It seriously was chunks of ice, like they put it in a bag and hammered the hell out of it, then dumped it into a bowl. The toppings were delicious, but who the hell likes to bite on chunks of ice as a dessert? Whatever, it was only $2.75 and the toppings were good.

I just wish more shaved ice places would offer these toppings.

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Little Cafe Siam
1450 Ala Moana Boulevard
Honolulu, HI
(808) 943-8424

When I was a kid my mother use to take me to San Jose on her days off. San Jose has a huge Vietnamese community that made my mom feel right at home. We would drive an hour just for some pho, then before we drove back home we would make a stop at a deli to stock up on some Vietnamese sandwiches.

If your not familiar with a Vietnamese sandwich it might look a little odd at first. A basic one, like the one you see above will consist of pork sausage, pickled sweet and sour carrots and radishes, cilantro, meat paste, mayonnaise, and sometimes a few fresh slices of jalapenos on a French roll. These have to be one of my all time favorite sandwiches.

This one was really good. However, I didn’t really care for the fish sauce they put on it because it made the sandwich a little too salty for my liking.

Summer Rolls, $4.29. These were large and nicely rolled. I liked that it came in a combo pack of one shrimp and one shredded pork roll.

As for my dessert I couldn’t decide between almond jello or tapioca so I got them both. At the low rate of $1.50 I could afford to treat myself. The almond jello was good but the tapioca one was really mushy and soft. I don’t think it was overdone, just probably sitting there too long.

Bale Sandwich Shop is one of the largest local chains in the state. With two locations in Maui, one on the big island, one on Kauai, and about twenty here on Oahu this place has really prospered and grown.

Overall I’m pretty satisfied with this place. The prices were fair, food was good. Just don’t order the tapioca unless it looks fresh and remember to ask for the sandwich without fish sauce.

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Ba Le Sandwich & Vietnamese Shop
333 Ward Ave.
Honolulu, HI 96815
(808) 591-0935

Every time we have plans to try this place another restaurant intercepts us in on the way. Well today we were determine with a one track mind and tunnel vision we finally made it for lunch.

The restaurant is quite large once inside.

This was our first pick. I have to say I’m not a huge fan of fried dim sum, only because by the time it rolls out to our table from the kitchen it’s not as hot and fresh. I’m sure we all can agree fried food taste best right out of the deep fryer when it’s hot and crispy. These fried shrimp won tons were crispy but they were room temperature, like they had been sitting out for hours.

I was quite certain that my taste buds would be a huge fan of these seafood balls rolled in sticky rice, but I was wrong. Wow, it just had a huge seafood taste that was so overpowering I could only eat the outer layer of rice on one of them. I don’t know what seafood is used but just think of seafood bologna rolled in sticky mochi rice. But maybe that was just me, cause Ray really liked these.

Pork hash is a must at dim sum. It’s just a safe plate as it is always delightfully fresh and appetizing.

Here’s another dish that’s new to me. Mochi balls stuffed with meat n’ stuff. Just so you all know, I’m not really a mochi fan. I do enjoy it but in small amounts. Biting into one of these was a little overwhelming for me because there was so much chewy mochi that it made it hard to swallow and when I finally did, it seemed like it wanted to come back up. However, once I made my way to the center I found the stuff inside to be surprising delectable.

Steamed pork buns, yet another classic dim sum pick. These were hot and tasted fresh not to mention very filling even after just one.

This time I saved the best for last. If you have not had these pineapple buns you must stop what your doing right now and get some. The sweet flaky top, and hot creamy egg custard filling puts you in a state of shear bliss. Do not get these things at a bakery, it’s never the same, only at a restaurant. Better yet, get them here they were amazing.

The whole bill came out to around $15.00. That’s why I love dim sum so much, it’s fun, delicious (most of the time), filling and always so cheap.

Here are some other reviews on Good Luck Chinese Restaurant that I found. Enjoy!

‘Ono Kine Grindz

Yelp

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100 N Beretania St #101
Honolulu, HI 96817
(808) 524-9988

Dim sum here I come. Yeah, I’m sure no one has ever said that before. When it comes to Dim Sum, I consider myself to be pretty darn experienced. Growing up in Pleasanton, California every Sunday our family would drive to San Francisco just to have dim sum. My father would read the Sing Tao Daily the week before in search of what the critics were saying was the newest, flashiest, and most affordable dim sum restaurant in all of San Francisco. Of course they were always in China Town. Thinking about it now I can’t help but miss my family. Golden Place is my first dim sum experience in Hawaii and it brought back fond memories for me.

I say that because like a lot of dim sum places that I went to as a child, from the outside it looks like a standard Chinese restaurant, but you walk in and it’s a little bigger, brighter, and busier than what you’d expect. As soon as we walked in one of the ladies pushing the carts of food stopped everything she was doing and ask, “how many?” We say, “two” and being a small group she points us over to the smallest table at the far corner of the restaurant.

I can’t tell you how aggravating it was to be ignored. Since we were in the corner they would of had to roll out of their usual route to get to us, not hard right. It wasn’t like they couldn’t see us, because the restaurant was a big open rectangular room. They just chose not to see us, probably because we wouldn’t have given them very much business being just two people. The table next to us, of two as well, we’re also getting impatient. Finally after sitting there for about 20 minutes I get up and decide to take it upon myself to get some food. Oh, also, I forgot to mention, that it was our anniversary on this day. August 25th makes it two years since we’ve been together and we’ve been engaged since February. Back to the story, so I go up to an abandoned cart, go through the bamboo trays for something tasty to eat. The lady comes back, I direct her to our table and have her follow me. She’s a total bitch and just stands there instead of showing us what was in the trays, so again I’m like whatever, don’t mind if I do. I get up and start going through all the trays myself showing Ray what was underneath each lid while the lady just stood there next to me. This is what we picked out.

This is sticky rice wrapped in banana leaves flavored with minced meat and sometimes a yolk from an egg. This is one of my favorites at dim sum and very filling.

This is my all time favorite pastry, pineapple bun. I don’t even know why they are called a pineapple bun as there is really no pineapple flavor. Like most pastries they’re best hot. Inside their cavernous walls lies gooey moist egg custard. Here’s some more fun food knowledge for you. I don’t know why, but for some retarded reason they only sell these pineapple buns at dim sum restaurants. Bakeries will sell similar ones, but the inside is usually some kind of dry filling, like coconut or beans and never as good.

I don’t know anyone who doesn’t like Pork Hash. It’s the one of the few things every person new to dim sum must try. These were really good.

Here’s some more fun food facts according to yours truly. Pork hashes are always accompanied in the same cart as these shrimp dumplings.

Maybe it’s because they just go so well together. We got two each of the pork hash and shrimp dumplings.

We decided that next time we eat here we’re going to say, “party of five, they’re meeting us here.” That way, we’ll be seated at a much larger table that is along side of their cart route. The bill came out to just over $12.00 for 6 dishes. Not bad for dim sum, but if you didn’t notice, only 3 items each were given per tray but they were a lot bigger than the usual 4 pieces that are given from most dim sum places so we were o.k. with it. There’s also food being sold just as you walk into the restaurant for to go. So if you want to eat but not dine, that would probably be better.

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Golden Palace Seafood.
111 N. King St.
Honolulu, HI
(808) 521-8268

O.K. so I’m gonna take this time to be a little racist and stereotypical and I feel totally o.k. being this brutally honest because I’m here at home, safe, behind the screen of my laptop. I’ve devised this theory; Asian people treat their shaved ice the way White people treat their ice cream sundaes. I never come across an Asian that goes crazy over a sundae and vice versa, but Asians love their shaved ice and White people love sundaes, even on Mondays. Also White people go crazy with sundaes, they put all kinds of shit in it: strawberries, pineapple, chocolate, marsh mellow cream, nuts cherries, carmel, whipped cream, the list goes on and on. Well, same goes for Asians and their shaved ice. We put beans, mochi balls, tapioca, fruit, jelly things, condense milk etc.

Here are some pictures of some yummy shaved ice toppings from a Chinese shaved ice cafe in Los Angelos.

You get my point?

Now when it comes to ice cream for Asians, we keep it simple, ice cream and maybe one other topping, otherwise it starts to look like something I regurgitated back up and am still consuming only because I’m too cheap to let it go to waste. I don’t want to fuck up my ice cream by mixing all kinds of crazy shit into it and of course white people feel the same about shaved ice, just ice and flavored syrup. As a matter of fact, most hales have never even heard of shaved ice with anything else. Ray, my half white, half Mexican fiance, who mine as well be white, goes, ” Babe, I never knew Asians loved shaved ice so much and all that crazy shit that you guys put on it. You would hate shaved ice in Texas, just ice and juice. Beans as a desert, it just doesn’t sound right,” he says. Oh, but it taste so good. Now Ray, and Shane still refuse to eat my shaved ice, they just can’t get past the bean thing. Ignorant fools, such poor unfortunate souls. Shaved Ice is not just ice and juice. And yes, I can tell you right now honey, I will despise it in Texas, that’s why I’m here and not there. Shaved ice is an art that I take very seriously. It’s not just about the toppings, but also the consistency, texture, fluffiness, the amount of condense milk in ratio to the amount of ice. You get my point.
Now that I’m done ranting, I’ve found a place that so far is one of my favorites on this island. Tropicana has shaved ice as light and fluffy as the clouds of heaven.

My only gripe was that they didn’t have as many toppings as that Chinese place in L.A.
All their specialty shaved ice comes with azuki beans, ice cream, condense milk, and mochi balls. I ordered the #8 lychee berries shaved ice. It comes with vanilla ice cream and is amazing. Ice cream and shaved ice, the best combo ever. The shaved ice was perfect. The way it dissolved in your mouth, like butter on hot toast. One way of judging good shaved ice is the ice itself. If it’s at all crunchy, or hard, it’s no good, move on, you deserve better than that.

On a separate occasion I got the #3, strawberry flavored shaved ice with strawberry ice cream. This time it came in a different bowl, but still just as yummy.

I had to get another one. This time the #2, Mountain Coffee with coffee ice cream inside. Again, I loved every bite.

And this is what it looks like on the inside

Ray got shaved ice with two flavors for $2.00.

On a separate occasion I got the #12 Green Tea, with green tea ice cream, $4.50. If your a fan of green tea your gonna love this. Its cool, refreshing and who knows, might even be healthy.

Also, all prices include tax, so you don’t have to worry about factoring that in. The price you see is the price you pay. Now if shaved ice just doesn’t excite you, that’s cool. To each one own, right? They also have bubble drinks, floats and a nice selection of ice cream. I suggest the shaved ice. Even Ray agrees that it’s just better here, but he still refused to eat the beans.

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Tropicana
3036 Waialae Ave,
Honolulu, HI
(808) 739-2098

I’ve been wanting to try this place out for some time now. Back in February when we were here on vacation we went to China Town for Chinese New Year. For dinner we went to this crowded restaurant where they sat you with strangers in order to accommodate everyone. The people that sat with us were totally friendly and suggested we try The Green Papaya if we get a chance. Well we didn’t get the chance to then but I made it a point to remember the name just in case we came back. One month later, we’re back and I finally got around to experiencing it for myself.

We ordered the seafood spring rolls to start, $9.95. It came with vermicelli noodles, lettuce cucumbers and mint leaves. They were really tasty and a perfect dish to start out with. It came with 7 so each of us were able to have a few. I suggest putting some of the rooster hot sauce in with the sauce that it comes with. It gives it a nice kick. After the egg rolls I mixed the rest of the stuff together and made a tasty salad with it.

For my entree I had a shrimp papaya salad, $8.95. I’m a sucker for papaya salads. They’re just really filling, light and scrumptious. Also, it’s the only salad that’s worth taking home for left overs because it doesn’t get soggy from all the dressing. I love that it came with plenty of basil. Basil is the best herb ever and not used enough. I added some rooster hot sauce to this plate as well. I love that stuff.

Shane got the Curry with Chicken, $8.95. Shane’s a curry whore. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him order anything else when we eat Vietnamese or Thai. It’s just too good to pass up. He was very pleased with his decision.

Ray ordered Chow Fun with Chicken, $8.95. This dish I saved for last because it was the reject dish. This would probably rank up there as one of the worst chow fun dishes that we have come across. First off, this isn’t chow fun. I don’t know who they think they’re fooling, maybe they ran out of chow fun noodles and tried to play it off with some other type of noodle. Perhaps they’re having a shortage on noodles all together because there was way more bean sprouts than noodles. The noodles that were there were over cooked and mushy. It was so disappointing. Now, when it comes to credentials, Ray and I are covered. Chow Fun is like Shane’s curry to Ray, he hardly orders anything else. As for me, I’m Chinese, not knowing what chow fun is is like not knowing what rice is. If you want good chow fun go to The Golden Eagle.

If your driving here there’s parking in the back, you could also enter the restaurant from there.

Overall, since the chow fun dish was not my order I’m quite pleased with this place. The prices aren’t super cheap, but still in the affordable range. I most definitely will come back, just not anytime soon. There’s just so much of Oahu I still need to see.

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Green Papaya
629 Keeaumoku St.
Honolulu, HI 96814
(808) 953-2340

Udon Ramen is a pretty basic place as far as sushi goes. Actually, I think that any Japanese place that offers .99 cent sushi rolls can be considered very basic. Hey, I’m not hating on it. I know some people are sushi snobs, just like some people are wine snobs, but I’m not. I really appreciate .99 cent sushi rolls. It’s not creative or artsy for sushi, but hey, you can’t deny that fish, rice and sushi paper just taste good together no matter how its put together.

Tamago (egg) and unagi (fresh water eel) rolls. .99 cents each.

Ray splurged and got a california maki (crab meat with avocado and cucumber) $4.95.

Shane got the nirigi. Three piece rolls were $2.50.

I know this wasn’t an amazing dinner but I got full off of $2.00 and that’s amazing.

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Udon Ramen
2310 Kuhio Ave
Honolulu, HI 96815

So our friend Val finally decided to bless us with her presence one day. She picked us up and we headed out for some Indian. I was psyched because I love Indian but don’t get to eat it often.
India Bazarr is a boxy place to get fast food for a somewhat decent price. It was hidden in the between a tiny strip of businesses perpendicular between Beritannia and S King Street. There is no menu as the food is laid out before you on top of a steamed table behind a glass counter. Names of the food is written on folded paper and placed in front of each item. Here’s the menu: veggie plate: rice and three vegetarian dishes for $7.00 and the chicken plate: rice, chicken and two vegetarian dishes for $7.25. There’s no table service, you just order, pay and eat. Ray and I got the chicken plate.

If you’ve been reading my blog then you will know that In my professional opinion Indian food is not the same without some hot, fresh, nan to tie it all together. It’s like Mexican food with no tortillas. Well this place had paratha nan and, like Indian Food, it was limp and room temperature with no soul and to top it off, cost $1.50 each. Ray and I got two each along with some orange pop to wash it down. Now this place started off to a good $7.25 start, but then you add the bread, drink and sauces that I was charged for and my new found excitement for this place slowly starts to dwindle. Oh, and yes I did say that I was charged for a small, 2 oz thing of sauce. If you don’t already know, I am a condiment whore. I love sauces, especially specialty sauces. There were a few different kinds so of course I asked for each one, and was charged a buck for each one, I think, it could of been .50 cents. All I know is that it was a small amount, dried up, and I was charged, yet another nickel and dime place.

As for the food, it was o.k. I didn’t love it, I didn’t hate it, however, it was not worth the 30 dollars we ended up paying for when everything was said and done. Oh well, Val still gets kudos for the suggestion, coming by to see us and good looks. Good job Val.

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2320 S King St #B4
Honolulu, HI 96826
(808) 949-4840

Formerly known as Catch of the Day, G Sushi will give you a run for your money. If you like Genki Sushi you will probably like G Sushi. Like Genki they place their sushi on a lazy susan and color cordinate their dishes. Yellow plates are $1.39, green plates are $2.19, pink plates are $2.69, etc. Also, if you don’t see anything you want you can order off the menu.

Shane’s turned us on to this deep fried spicy tuna. It’s like a deep fried golden sushi nugget. For $2.69 I’m so sold. I haven’t been able to find anything like it sence. This is the sole reason Shane and I return to this place. Nothing else matters. If you haven’t had it you have no idea.

This dumpling was floating by and I decided to give it a try. I have no idea what it is or called as it was not even on the menu. I ate one before I remembered to take a picture. It looks better than it tastes which confirms that all you need to know about this place is the deep fried spicy tuna is golden, nothing else matters.

I almost forgot to mention, don’t forget to ask for a frequent customer card there. For every $10.00 spent you get a box stamped and a full card means $10.00 off your next meal. I think that’s a pretty sweet deal considering that $10.00 can easily buy me lunch there.

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G Sushi
2919 Kapiolani Blvd # 23
Honolulu, HI 96826
(808) 732-9661

Growing up, my parents owned a small Chinese restaurant call Golden Dragon in a small town in California. I worked there since I was in the 5th grade up until I transferred to San Francisco State University. Since then, my Chinese food consumption has gone down tremendously. Could it be that nothing compares to ma and pops traditional cooking or that I actually have to pay for food now or both?

Anyhow, The Golden Eagle is fairly close to the University Hawaii, which means it’s more than likely going to be affordable. Ray and I shared the Seafood Chow Fun. It’s Ray favorite Chinese dish, next to me of course.

This dish cost us $11.49 and that’s including tax. It wasn’t on the menu, but here’s more free knowledge I’m willing to share with you. When your dinning at a Chinese restaurant you can basically have anything you want. Money talks and if you want it and the Chinese has it, they’ll gladly make it for you . . . for a small fee of course. Next time your out for Chinese and you think to yourself, “man, Mongolian beef sounds good, but I’ve had way too much red meat lately. I really wish they had Mongolian chicken instead.” Order it, It’s your world sweet cheeks, you can have anything you want, but make sure you bring cash because Chinese no like paying tax and a lot of places will not settle for anything less.

Back to the food. It was delicious. Generally, when you order chow fun, which is rice noodles, the waiter will ask you if you want it wet or dry, which means do you want it with or without sauce. I suggest with and that’s the way we ordered it. It was everything we had hoped and more. The vegetables were fresh and crispy. It was flavorful without being too salty. The service was good and we even got free tea, but no fortune cookie. That’s o.k. I don’t need a cookie to tell me how my life’s gonna turn out, that’s what I pay Sylvia, my psychic, for. Here’s my fortune cookie fun fact of the day for you, fortune cookies are an American invention, just like chop suey. Desserts were not traditionally part of Chinese cuisine, and the cookies thus offered Americans something familiar with an exotic flair. Who would of thought, writing a message in a freaking cookie could be so popular. I think we should take this a step further and start writing subliminal messages on toilet paper so after we’re done with our reading material we could wipe our ass with something really really special.

Directions to Golden Eagle

Don’t judge me because of this blog. If you want to know the truth, I can’t stand McDonald’s. I don’t think anyone one should ever step foot in a fast food establishment. However there are exceptions. For example, when I traveled to China a few years back, I was a huge fan of McDonald’s; their #1 fan, I should of bought stock, I loved them so much. I didn’t necessarily go there for food, but more for their free facilities. Another acceptable reason for going into a fast food joint is when they offer new items, not a new double hamburger with special sauce, but more like new items that are only offered in that region. Which is my reason for going to this McDonald’s, the taro root pie.

For those of you that are not familiar with taro root, let me share some knowledge with you. Taro root is native to Asia and grown extensively in the Pacific. It’s commonly used in the Hawaiian dish, poi. Good-quality taro root will be firm, brown and have hairy roots and must be eaten cooked with the skins removed. Use in a wide array of dishes, taro root is available year-round. It contains no fat, no cholesterol, no sodium, has few calories, and is very starchy.

As for the taro root pie, it looks just like McDonald’s classic apple pie on the outside, but on the inside it looks like Barney took a big fat shit.

A lot of my friends don’t like taro root because the only time they ever had it was at a fake luau. where it was in the form of poi, which has been said to taste like glue. In truth, this wasn’t bad. It’s not something I would come back for seconds for but it served its purpose and filled my curiosity. I liked it, a little. I was surprised to see that it even resembled the picture.

Wow! Now that’s pretty fucking impressive.

The taro root pie cost me .99 cents and is not offered on the mainland, not that I’m aware of. Now, here’s my advice, you should make a day of it and head to Barnes and Nobles, buy Fast Food Nation, the book. If your not a fan of reading, it’s cool, rent it instead at the local video store, I suggest Diamond Head Video. Also while your at it rent Super Size Me. On the way home make a quick stop at McDonald’s and treat your self to something fantastic. Don’t forget to super size it!

As I mentioned before I only go to McDonald’s for their free facilities and food that’s only offered here and no where else. Pies must be an easy outlet for them to venture out and be creative. When I first saw McDonald’s marketing their new Haupia Pies for .99 cents I knew that one day I would have enough time, money and energy to go and pick one of these bad boys up and give it a whirl.

Now for those of you that don’t know what the heck a haupia is, no worries. Haupia just means coconut milk based. In most cases it comes in the form of gelatin, but it’s also enjoyed as a cream or custard filling as it is here.

Again, I hate to admit it but this was good. The outside crust was crispy and flaky while the haupia filling inside was creamy, a little lumpy, warm, and not too sweet. Man, I really wish I hated the shit out of these pies. Trust me I want to bash the hell out of McDonalds’, but honesty is my freaking policy. Hey don’t get me wrong now, this was for blog purposes only. The pie you see here is the first and last haupia pie I will ever eat.

I would give you directions, but what’s the point? There’s a McDonalds’ at every other corner of every street in the world. If you can’t find one you are stupid.

Word on the street is that Genki Sushi in Japan is the equivalent to a McDonalds in America. It’s fast food that’s cheap. If you ask me, anything is better than McDonalds, but lets compare for shits and grits. Genki Sushi will kick that clown in the ass when it comes to speed. There’s really no way to be any faster. As soon as you sit that sweet ass of yours down you can start making it fatter, or phat-er (pretty hot and tempting) because sushi is floating ever so gracefully on a boat, or plate, just waiting for the opportunity for someone to turn it into a fob, aka, F.O.B. fresh off the boat. Hey, everyone loves a Fob, that’s why I’m so popular. If there’s something that you want and it’s not floating by, you can order it. That’s right, real live fobs walking around, ready to take orders in exchange for American citizenship. Also, the plates are color coordinated for all those retards out there. Gold plates are $1.40, green plates are $2.00, red plates are $2.60, etc. Hey, if your a cheap ass stay away from the silver and black plates, they’re $3.75 and $4.60.

Gold plate $1.40

Red plate $2.60

Red plate? That’s right, $2.60. Good job Mr. Retard.

Click below for directions.

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Genki Sushi
885 Kapahulu Ave.
Honolulu, HI
(808) 735-7700

Don’t let the name fool you. If your in the mood for European food this isn’t the place for you. I think the only thing that can be considered French here is the croissant and the French bread or baguette that the sandwiches are made with. At lot of Vietnamese dinning establishments will refer to themselves as “French” this is because in 1900 Vietnam became a colony of France with the French in control of all the levels of government. That all for the fun facts lets get on with the food. I got a steamed pork sandwich. If you have never had a Vietnamese style sandwich and your totally open to trying new things, then you should definitely have one. I’ve been eating steamed pork sandwiches ever since I was a little girl. My mom use to take me to the Vietnamese sandwich shop in San Jose, California. I love them. However, they aren’t for everyone. My fiance absolutely loves sandwiches, but refuses to even try these sandwiches. He won’t even take a bite because he says he already knows he’s not gonna like it.

A very friendly China-men greeted me at the window. I don’t know if he was nice to me because I was of the same ethnic background and spoke to him in Cantonese or maybe he was physic and knew I wrote a food blog and he wanted me to give him a good review. I guess we’ll just never know.

A typical “French” (Vietnamese) sandwich will consist of cilantro, steam pork meat, sweet and sour (pickled) radishes and carrots, meat paste spread, mayonnaise, raw hot peppers and sometimes cucumber.

The sandwich cost me under $5.00. I asked for extra pickled radishes and carrots and it was given with no additional charge. Pickled radishes and carrots are used a lot in Vietnamese food. I brought my sandwich home and ate every last bite.

Among sandwiches they also have milkshakes, fresh coconut, fruit, and shaved ice. Yum. The French cafe is located in the heart of Waikiki on Kalakaua St inside the International Market Place. There’s a large food court there so if you don’t fancy yourself a “French” sandwich that’s cool, eat something eles.

Directions to French Cafe

Sushi Robot is another place outside of Don Quijote. It’s not a bad place. They’re reasonably priced and fast. Actually, all the food is already made and wrapped up for you, just grab, pay and eat. There’s plenty of covered benches right to the side. I wasn’t really in the mood for meat today so I got some kind of vegetable dish. I’m not sure if it even had a name, but it looked decent, different and it was cheap. You get white rice, an egg patty, steamed lotus root, mushrooms, potato balls, carrots and pickled radishes to the side for under $3.00. If only all my meals were so cheap.

Ray got a small tray of sushi. Nothing crazy, just the typical radish, tofu and tuna roll. That too was under $3.00.

We brought bottled water, as I always do. I make it a habit to bring bottled water everywhere I go. It’s healthy and saves me money. If your on vacation I recommend you to go to Costco, Walmart, or Don Quijote, since it’s right there, and buy a case. This will probably save you around $45. dollars as oppose to buying a drink every time you go out to eat. Buying individual bottles will not save you money. Anyway, the sushi was good. Service was fast, I didn’t get that fat lard feeling afterward and best of all, I spent less than $7.00. If you want directions click below.

Directions to Sushi Robot

Where I’m from, there’s one Indian restaurant for every hooker, not that I’ve ever even seen a hooker at an Indian restaurant but the numbers are about the same. There’s not many Indian places to roam to here on Oahu but at least there’s better looking hookers. The fist Indian place I found was too expensive to write about so I kept searching. I did, however, run into another Indian restaurant the other day in China Town. Shane, Ray and I went to Maunakea Market Place on Maunakea Street. We followed our instincts through two sets of red doors that led us to a secret underground food court, or at least that’s what it felt like. The place was dark and dingy. A mixture of lumpias, basil and fish filled the air. I was in hole in the wall central and I could not have been happier. I quickly scanned the isle for all that this place had to offer me. There was a mixture of Filipino, Chinese, Vietnamese, Korean and even to my surprise, Indian food. If your not familiar with Indian food I think It would be best for you to mentally prepare yourself beforehand. Their dishes tend to be shades of greens, yellow and brown and consists of meat or vegetables usually in some sort of sauce. So picture meat chunks in dark sauce. It’s like sick baby hippo shit, and yes, I do know what sick baby hippo shit looks like; I see it all the time. Yum, not hippo baby shit but Indian food. It’s delicious. It just takes getting use to looking at if your not accustom to it, or at least it did for me. I haven’t had Indian since I’ve moved, so of course I had to have it.

This place was called Indian Food Curry and BBQ, not much thought put into naming it but hey nothing wrong with keeping it simple. Ray and Shane joined my band wagon and decided upon Indian as well. The food laid behind a glass window, where you pick two choices for $5.00, three choices for $6.00 or all you can eat for $6.99. I choose all you can eat. I was given rice and a little of everything else. If you’ve already had Indian before then you would know that It’s not worth having unless you have it with nann, which is delicious, hot, mouth watering, melts in your mouth, bread, at least that’s the nann the bay area has spoiled me with. The nann here was not hot out of the oven and cost an extra $1.oo. I was hungry and so excited to eat Indian, so the first few bites were amazing but as I kept eating I soon lost interest.

Honestly, the food was satisfactory. Service, though, was fabulous. It was obviously family owned and operated. The father was kind and generous. His daughter came over later and gave me a sugary treat on the house after I had already sat down to eat. I want to say that my experience overall was delightful. I love hole in the wall places that are family owned and operated especially when it’s done with a smile and that was exactly what this place was. For directions click below.

Indian Food Curry and BBQ

O.k. I found a place that is worthy of a visit. While out looking for a place to live, my fiance and I stumbled upon a cute little restaurant called Royal Pearl Vietnamese Restaurant. Skimming the menu I noticed the prices were about 2-3 dollars cheaper, per item, than the Vietnamese restaurant that I went to the night before in Waikiki. I ordered the beef salad for $6.75. If your idea of an Asian salad is the typical Chinese chicken salad I highly suggest you venture out of your realm, especially if your one of those people that just don’t do salads, like Ray. Vegetables are good for you. My salad consisted of finely sliced beef strips, roman lettuce, finely sliced onions, sweet and sour radishes and carrots and fresh herbs like mint and basil with toasted onions and peanuts atop. I don’t know what type of dressing that was used, but it tasted like somewhat of a vinaigrette, without any oil. I think the most fattening item was the toasted onions, as there was no visible fat on my beef. I ate ever last bit of it because it was too good to go to waste and too little to pack up. Although I took in more than I should of, it didn’t give me that nasty, heavy feeling; no food coma what so ever.
Ray, he’s not a huge fan of Vietnamese or Thai. He says it smells like skanky hooker pussy. He’s referring to the fish sauce of course and how he even knows what skank hooker pussy smells like, I really don’t want to know. If your not familiar with fish sauce, it’s used in many Asian dishes especially Vietnamese and Thai. I’m not sure what it actually consists of or if it even has any fish in it at all, but it’s really salty and rarely used alone. Usually sugar, vinegar and other spices are added to balance out the salty flavor. Now about the smell, it only has a strong pungent scent if it gets on your clothes or skin. Next time your at a restaurant with fish sauce go ahead and take a whiff. Sure, it’ll smell a little, but that’s only because your all up in it’s business. Now take a little drop of it and rub it on the back of your palm. Now smell, mmm, there’s nothing like skank hooker pussy that makes your taste buds dance. Take a napkin and wipe your face because your drooling and embarrassing your family and friends.

Ray ordered the summer rolls. There’s two per order for $4.25. There’s only one in the picture because the other one was in his mouth. His only complaint was that there wasn’t any crab meat in it. Sometime back he order spring rolls that came with crab meat and shrimp. I told him it was a fluke because they don’t usually come with crab meat, just shrimp, rice noodles, basil, and lettuce with peanut sauce as dip. However, this apparently traumatized him as he is still is not over it and mentions every time he eats a summer roll that he likes the kind with crab in it. Whatever, if you know of any places please leave me a comment.

As for the ambiance, it was quaint and humble. There were even a few tables separated by bamboo screens, giving a very private and exotic dinning experience. The chairs were of Asian decor and not the typical cheesy 1980′s hotel freebees. The only thing cheesy about this place was the Christmas lights that hung inside above the window in mid April. This wasn’t a super cheap place but definitely affordable. Within the menu I found some low budget meals : Vietnamese sandwich – $5.50, Tofu salad – $5.95, Curry beef or chicken – $6.50, and Banana tapioca – $2.50. I think this place is worth a try and if you do, please don’t steal the fish sauce as a souvenir. Karma will bite you in the ass and it will spill all over your suit case and everyone will know what you did in on vacation in Hawaii.

Directions to Royal Pearl Bistro

Amongst spam, sushi and Kahlua pork, ramen is a popular commodity here on the island. Now, I’m not a huge fan of Ramen. Honestly, I’m a little confused as to why it is so popular. Why would anyone want to eat noodles in steamy hot broth in Hawaii? It’s like drinking hot green tea in a sauna. Hot soup in Hawaii is to green tea in a sauna. The more I thought about it the more cleansing and relaxing it sounded to me. I suddenly felt the need for a proper detox, the Asian way, the Ramen way.

There’s a ramen place in side the food court at the Ala Mouana Mall. I decided to check it out after a long day of shopping. Naniwa Ya Ramen didn’t look very busy, the prices looked decent and the place looked clean. After further examining the menu, I ordered the won ton ramen. Now if your not familiar with what a won ton is, it’s a flat square noodle that is wrapped around meant, usually ground pork. Won tons can be prepared in soup, deep fried , or as my mother use to serve them, steamed with a dipping sauce. It took about 5 minutes till I got my food, I took a minute to observe my food before I ate it. The noodle’s were perfect, not over or under cooked, just like the green veggies that came with it. the broth was tasty, and hot. Temperature of food is a big deal for me. If food is meant to be hot, then that’s the way I want it to be. The brightly colored pink thing in my soup was scrumptious. It tasted like some sort of seafood. Just think of imitation seafood meat, but not flaky and not imitation. the won tons, on the other hand were a huge disappointment. the noodles were a little too soft, probably from being over cooked. The meat that resided within was barely the size of the meat in a can of spaghetti O’s. Not to mention it tasted like free-range meat. There was absolutely no thought put into the creation of what could have been a very tasty treat. Considering my family use to own a small Chinese restaurant where I have spent many hours in mass production of the won ton, yes it is safe to call me a won ton expert. I’ll have it put in bold print on my new business cards. At first I didn’t think enough of them were given, but the more I ate the more I wanted to trade them in for those brightly colored pink seafood things. The meal cost me a little over $7.00. Now $7.00 still puts you in the cheap food catacgory, but when it resembles that of a .25 cents top ramen pack it starts to look a little pricey. If you want my advice, go to the grocery store and buy some green tea and head to the nearest sauna.

Directions to Naniwa Ya Ramen