I ordered Italian Sandwich, $6.95. It came with molinari Italian salami pepperoni, ham, provolone cheese, lettuce, tomato, mayo and Italian dressing. They don’t have combo meals so I was forced to order everything ala cart. I got a bag of chips, $1.75 and a medium sprite for, $1. 50 to share with my honey.

The whole meal was fabulous. It was a really good sandwich in every way but size. I don’t recommend sharing this if your hungry. It was just enough to fill us up but leave us hungry for more in another hour. Which I guess isn’t so bad since it’s better to eat more meals at smaller portions throughout the day.

Another great thing I love about this place is that they are locally owned and work with local farmers. I support supporting local farmers.

Aloha Salads is right next door to Gourmet Express which also has really good food.

click below for directions

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Kahala Mall
4211 Waialae Avenue
Honolulu, HI 96816
808 735-8334
10:00 AM-9 PM Daily

If your down in Waikiki the International Food Court is probably one of your best bet for fast, affordable food. It’s tucked away between Kuhio and Kalakowa. The picture above is through the side entrance. One of the things I like about the International Food Court is the variety of food that’s offered. Say your in the mood for Chinese, and somebody else wants Korean, and then someone else just wants some ice cream, the International Food Court can make that happen. It’s a beautiful thing. Also, I don’t know about you guys, but I’m a fan of food photos that show you what you will be ordering. Most places here have photos of their food and you place your order by the number system. Photo #1 is order #1, photo #2 is order #2, you get my point. I wish more places would work this way. Pomai from The Tasty Island agrees with me and also mentioned the number system in a recently post on Bob’s.

Lots of outside seating to choose from

I’m a strong supporter of Vietnamese food so Saigon Express is where I tend to pick when I come here.

I got the Look Funn Steamed Pork, $7.00 and #23. My meal was served in a plastic bowl and it came with fish sauce to pour over or dip. I really enjoyed this dish and only wish they had given me more carrots and radishes, oh, and onions. I had to ask for the mint; the photo had it but my dish lacked it. My noodles, or look funn were soft and tasted perfect with the steamed pork. It was a very light dish that didn’t give me constipation, gas, bloating, diarehha, or make me feel like a glutton.

If the Look Fun wasn’t really your thing, then the Shrimp Pad Thai might be, $8.50 and #19 on the menu. This is what my friend Shane’s ordered. I tasted it and it was amazing, but when I looked at it I told him it looked like it had a lot of bean sprouts. He said it didn’t taste that way at all and it didn’t to me either.

Yes there’s another Greek place on the island and it’s located inside the International Market. I think it’s called the Greek Grill, but there’s not really a header above it’s place. This is usually Ray’s pick. He’s a fan of eating cute biblical animals like lamb on a soft warm pita bread.

God must of needed some lambs today because there seemed to be a shortage in Ray’s gyro. He gets this every time he comes here and we remember it being a lot more meaty.

And it was really creamy today. Sheesh, Not a lot of love today, but thankfully just as good as he remembered. And 10 minutes after eating, Ray breaks out into a sweat, another party gone wrong in his pants and he’s left in explosive asshole agony once again. I’m not saying this to deter you from coming here, my honey is just a bit sensitive to cream, or maybe God has a sense of humor after all.

For directions click below
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International Market Place
2330 Kalakaua Ave # 200
Honolulu, HI 96815

Get Directions(808) 971-2080

Oh mall food, where do I began. I’ve never been a fan of most mall food because most of the time it’s just seems as though it’s a clutter of fast food, poor in quality with really horrible service all within an overcrowded food court. Unless of course it’s a restaurant all on it’s own and, well, that’s a different story. We were turned on to Gourmet Express by a close friend of ours, who chooses to remain anonymous, Amber. She said it wasn’t really expensive, the portions were pretty big and it was surprisingly good. Also, they have vegetarian items, which is a good thing since she’s one of those people. While shopping at Kahala Mall one day Ray and I happen to stumble upon Gourmet Express and decided to give it a whirl.

It’s Christmas time at Kahala Mall so pick a seat around their festively large tree.

I didn’t mind the mall food court on this side of the mall because it didn’t give me that mall food court vibe. As you can see although all the tables are taken up there’s not a lot of hyperactive energy going on. Did I mention it was Christmas time?

Since we weren’t ridiculously hungry we decided to share something. I know I mentioned this before but I highly recommend sharing. Ray and I do it almost every time. It prevents us from overeating and allows us to try anything on the menu without worrying about how expensive it is since we save money on the extra meal we can splurge on anything we want so long as we agree on it. On this day we decided on a Quesadilla. Ray goes, “We’re gonna get a Chicken Quesadilla. Is there a difference on the Chicken or Checken.” And the lady behinds the counter goes, “Huh?” looks up at the sign and goes, “Oh, it’s just spelt wrong.” I have one word for you, Retards. They have to be. I mean if both of them were spelled, “checken,” well then that’s a different story. I spell words wrong all the time but the first one was correctly spelled so how is it that they couldn’t manage to correctly spell the second one. I mean, really it’s right there in front of them. It baffles me. This person had to be highly confused and in a moment of despair decided to play the odds game. At least this way one of them would be correct. Great, now I’m a little worried about the turnout of my food.

Here it is, Checken Pesto Quesadilla, $6.99. As you can see the presentation is pretty basic. Our quesadilla came in four cut pieces in a styrofoam container inside a plastic bag with a small side of salsa. You can see Rays arm to the side so hopefully you guys can have an idea of how nice the portions were.

The quesadillas were fully packed with chicken, cheese, pesto sauce, tomatoes and even corn. Wow, it was really good. The pesto sauce was mixed with olive oil so even though it seemed a little greasy it was the good grease. The chicken didn’t once taste fatty or too dry. I told Ray I wouldn’t question this dish the least bit if it were served at a gourmet restaurant on a fancy plate with lovely garnish and a lovely price to match. The salsa was nothing spectacular, tasted like the can stuff you get at the grocery stores.

This might not look very enticing but I opened up the last bit of my quesadilla so you guys have an idea of what’s on the inside. No surprises.

There you have it folks. I was happy, Ray was happy and we have Amber to thank for it and now you do too. Thanks Amber, now just go over there, show them which chicken is correct and everyone will be happy.

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Gourmet Express
4211 Waialae Ave
Honolulu, HI 96816
(808) 732-7700

Is it just me or does food from a food court located inside a mall never sound enticing? It seems like it’s just fuel to keep the shopping energy flowing. Anyway, it seems like I go through the same routine everytime I end up eating at the mall, I take a full walk through just to end up getting Thai. I’ve had their papaya salad twice so far and I’m a fan. Though, both times I’ve forgotten my camera, but trust me it’s good. They ask you if you want it spicy, medium or mild. Their spicy is really really spicy, so I suggest to go medium, which I did and was still slightly too spicy. It’s made fresh right in front of you.

Now, not every thing is good there. They have this crushed ice dessert that sucks donkey dick.

Looks good right. When I saw this I thought it was shaved ice with coconut milk and a variety of toppings to choose from to top it off. Finally, more toppings to choose from, I was so excited. Not that I don’t love shaved ice, but it seems like all they have for toppings is the usual azuki beans. Don’t get me wrong, I love azuki beans, especially on my shaved ice, but I also love my variety. Well, I should of took this ad literal. It wasn’t shaved ice, but crushed ice. It seriously was chunks of ice, like they put it in a bag and hammered the hell out of it, then dumped it into a bowl. The toppings were delicious, but who the hell likes to bite on chunks of ice as a dessert? Whatever, it was only $2.75 and the toppings were good.

I just wish more shaved ice places would offer these toppings.

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Little Cafe Siam
1450 Ala Moana Boulevard
Honolulu, HI
(808) 943-8424

A while back before grocery shopping at Don Quijote I made a quick stop at Fiore Frozen Delight for some refreshing frozen yogurt. I’m a huge fan of shaved ice, so when I saw that they offered their frozen yogurt with shaved ice along with 5 toppings I couldn’t resist. The whole thing cost me $5.97 and was most definitely a waste of my money. It left an after taste in my mouth similar to that of vomit. No, this time I’m not trying to be funny, I’m dead serious. You know those times when you have a little too much to drink and burp up a little throw up and it leaves a sour taste in your mouth, that’s exactly what it tastes like. Not to mention, the ice underneath the yogurt was crunchy and hard. Shaved ice should be soft and fluffy. The toppings were scarce and not very fresh. No other flavored syrup was added to the ice. What’s the point of eating yogurt on top of ice? A lot of bites were just oreos and ice or granola and ice. The dessert just didn’t mix well. I wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt. It could have been a fluke; maybe they didn’t wash their machines out enough or business hasn’t been very good so the yogurt went a little sour? Who knows.

The funny thing is, about a month later before grocery shopping we gave our roommate a call to see if he wanted to meet up for lunch. What can I say, we all just can’t get enough of each other. Anyhow, Shane ends up coming back to the table with, yep, Fiore Naturally Regurgitated Yogurt.

I said, “yuck, you like that nasty shit.”

And he goes, “I’m not really that hungry, I just wanted a snack” and then realize that I said I didn’t like the frozen treat in his hand which comes off really odd, since I have a passion for sweet treats. “What, you don’t like this?”

I explained to him that I thought it tasted like you burped up a little throw up. He takes another taste, pauses, and then goes, “now I can’t eat this, I know exactly what your talking about,” and didn’t take another bite.

Also, take a look at their ad. It just looks like throw up in a glass.

Now I’m not saying everyone will hate this. The guy next to us had some and ate every last bit of it. If your bulimic this will probably have a familiar taste for you, like moms homemade key lime pie right after you sneak away to the restroom and deep throat a coat hanger just to regurgitate it back up. Yum!

Fiore Natural Frozen Yogurt Website Directions

Sushi Robot is another place outside of Don Quijote. It’s not a bad place. They’re reasonably priced and fast. Actually, all the food is already made and wrapped up for you, just grab, pay and eat. There’s plenty of covered benches right to the side. I wasn’t really in the mood for meat today so I got some kind of vegetable dish. I’m not sure if it even had a name, but it looked decent, different and it was cheap. You get white rice, an egg patty, steamed lotus root, mushrooms, potato balls, carrots and pickled radishes to the side for under $3.00. If only all my meals were so cheap.

Ray got a small tray of sushi. Nothing crazy, just the typical radish, tofu and tuna roll. That too was under $3.00.

We brought bottled water, as I always do. I make it a habit to bring bottled water everywhere I go. It’s healthy and saves me money. If your on vacation I recommend you to go to Costco, Walmart, or Don Quijote, since it’s right there, and buy a case. This will probably save you around $45. dollars as oppose to buying a drink every time you go out to eat. Buying individual bottles will not save you money. Anyway, the sushi was good. Service was fast, I didn’t get that fat lard feeling afterward and best of all, I spent less than $7.00. If you want directions click below.

Directions to Sushi Robot

Where I’m from, there’s one Indian restaurant for every hooker, not that I’ve ever even seen a hooker at an Indian restaurant but the numbers are about the same. There’s not many Indian places to roam to here on Oahu but at least there’s better looking hookers. The fist Indian place I found was too expensive to write about so I kept searching. I did, however, run into another Indian restaurant the other day in China Town. Shane, Ray and I went to Maunakea Market Place on Maunakea Street. We followed our instincts through two sets of red doors that led us to a secret underground food court, or at least that’s what it felt like. The place was dark and dingy. A mixture of lumpias, basil and fish filled the air. I was in hole in the wall central and I could not have been happier. I quickly scanned the isle for all that this place had to offer me. There was a mixture of Filipino, Chinese, Vietnamese, Korean and even to my surprise, Indian food. If your not familiar with Indian food I think It would be best for you to mentally prepare yourself beforehand. Their dishes tend to be shades of greens, yellow and brown and consists of meat or vegetables usually in some sort of sauce. So picture meat chunks in dark sauce. It’s like sick baby hippo shit, and yes, I do know what sick baby hippo shit looks like; I see it all the time. Yum, not hippo baby shit but Indian food. It’s delicious. It just takes getting use to looking at if your not accustom to it, or at least it did for me. I haven’t had Indian since I’ve moved, so of course I had to have it.

This place was called Indian Food Curry and BBQ, not much thought put into naming it but hey nothing wrong with keeping it simple. Ray and Shane joined my band wagon and decided upon Indian as well. The food laid behind a glass window, where you pick two choices for $5.00, three choices for $6.00 or all you can eat for $6.99. I choose all you can eat. I was given rice and a little of everything else. If you’ve already had Indian before then you would know that It’s not worth having unless you have it with nann, which is delicious, hot, mouth watering, melts in your mouth, bread, at least that’s the nann the bay area has spoiled me with. The nann here was not hot out of the oven and cost an extra $1.oo. I was hungry and so excited to eat Indian, so the first few bites were amazing but as I kept eating I soon lost interest.

Honestly, the food was satisfactory. Service, though, was fabulous. It was obviously family owned and operated. The father was kind and generous. His daughter came over later and gave me a sugary treat on the house after I had already sat down to eat. I want to say that my experience overall was delightful. I love hole in the wall places that are family owned and operated especially when it’s done with a smile and that was exactly what this place was. For directions click below.

Indian Food Curry and BBQ

If you don’t have a Costoc card I highly recommend getting one or find a friend that has one. I don’t know if I would be the person I am today if I had not had a Costco in my life. Costco has a ridiculous return policy, which I do admit I use to my advantage quite often. They give out free samples of food. Go on the weekend there’s a lot more samples but also a lot more people. Costco also has an amazingly cheap food court. Let’s say your too cheap to purchase a Costco card and you don’t have any friends, have no fear. A friend once told me that special things just seem to happen here. When I saw a food court outside of Costco for the first time I became a believer. I’m from all over California and as a religious member of Costco purchaser of bulk items I have only attended Costcos with courts inside. Now some might think that there’s nothing magical about this, well perhaps not, but special, without a doubt.

Eat Costco’s food without being a member. Don’t worry about the member card thing, they NEVER, ask for it at the food court. At Costco one can get a whole meal for $1.50. Friend, I would not lie to you. I know because that’s exactly what I have done, on several occasions. A hot dog or polish dog and a 16 oz drink for $1.50. These aren’t wimpy limp dogs, but could quite possibly be one of the largest dogs I have ever encountered. Not only that but they’re kosher. Not Jewish, that’s cool, I’m not either. If you like sour kraut you have to ask for it when you order. Hot dogs aren’t very exciting to you? Well, they also have large slices of pizza for $1.99 and and whole 18″ pizza for $9.95. Chicken Bakes for $2.69, but I don’t recommend those. They’re usually over done and has a weird creamy filling. Not a junk food person, no worries, there’s a chicken caesar salad for $3.79. Love sugar, but not the fat, sweet. There’s also berry smoothies, mocha freeze, berry sundae, and nonfat yogurt all between $1.25 – $1.55. As for the fat, think yourself thin or exercise but whatever you do, don’t cut back on the sugar. Don’t ever listen to anyone if they tell you to do that. Actually if anyone ever tells you that you should instantly call the authorities. This person is probably a terrorist or pedophile. Sugar is like love, you need it, everyone needs it. Sugar balances our equilibrium, wakes the sun up in the morning and brings the moon out at night. Enough of it has the power to stop global warming. Without it the world would stop and everyone will die. I’m doing my part; I purchased an ice cream bar. It’s ginormous and only cost me $1.50. It comes rolled in nuts or without.

If you do make a stop by the food court, keep in mind that they only take cash, or American Express. I forgot the one day and had to walk awkwardly walk away, without any food after standing in line for 15 minutes.

If you want directions or more info here’s a link

Costco in Hawaii

Looking for something other than Asian food? Well I got a place for you. Today Ray and I decided to go grocery shopping. It’s sad but since we arrived here I’ve attempted to cooked once, and it was a crappy breakfast burrito. Even though I’m not all that domesticated, I know I’m better than that, so I went out to redeem myself. Outside of Don Quijote Grocery Store lies a food court. It’s perfect for the hungry shoppers that just can’t wait. Besides, shopping on a hungry stomach only makes your eyes bigger than your stomach which will only cause you to spend more money on food you really don’t need and then you will get fat. That’s not cool. I say, go ahead, explore your options, eat some food. There are a wide array of options here, Korean food, Chinese food, Italian food, a bakery, Japanese, and Greek. I decided on Leo’s Taverna Express Healthy Greek Food. They had lamb gyros for $4.95. Some people aren’t too keen on the idea of eating cute little lambs, and a lot of people just aren’t accustomed with this meat. I love lamb, especially when I eat Indian food. Lamb is very tender and delectable. Unless your a vegetarian, or it’s against your religion I urge you to try it. These gyros were hefty. Large people or people with a large appetite should order two, otherwise there’s really no reason to order more than one. It consists of lamb, lettuce, diced tomatoes and cucumber sauce within a soft warm pita bread. Yum. Yeah, It’s o.k. to order another one, it’s worth the fat, and besides according to Leo, it’s suppose to be healthy. The menu also had other items such as hummus for $4.75, Chicken Wrap for $6.95, and a Greek Salad for $7.25. Enjoy!

Directions to Don Quijote (Don Quijote just bought Daiei Inc)

Amongst spam, sushi and Kahlua pork, ramen is a popular commodity here on the island. Now, I’m not a huge fan of Ramen. Honestly, I’m a little confused as to why it is so popular. Why would anyone want to eat noodles in steamy hot broth in Hawaii? It’s like drinking hot green tea in a sauna. Hot soup in Hawaii is to green tea in a sauna. The more I thought about it the more cleansing and relaxing it sounded to me. I suddenly felt the need for a proper detox, the Asian way, the Ramen way.

There’s a ramen place in side the food court at the Ala Mouana Mall. I decided to check it out after a long day of shopping. Naniwa Ya Ramen didn’t look very busy, the prices looked decent and the place looked clean. After further examining the menu, I ordered the won ton ramen. Now if your not familiar with what a won ton is, it’s a flat square noodle that is wrapped around meant, usually ground pork. Won tons can be prepared in soup, deep fried , or as my mother use to serve them, steamed with a dipping sauce. It took about 5 minutes till I got my food, I took a minute to observe my food before I ate it. The noodle’s were perfect, not over or under cooked, just like the green veggies that came with it. the broth was tasty, and hot. Temperature of food is a big deal for me. If food is meant to be hot, then that’s the way I want it to be. The brightly colored pink thing in my soup was scrumptious. It tasted like some sort of seafood. Just think of imitation seafood meat, but not flaky and not imitation. the won tons, on the other hand were a huge disappointment. the noodles were a little too soft, probably from being over cooked. The meat that resided within was barely the size of the meat in a can of spaghetti O’s. Not to mention it tasted like free-range meat. There was absolutely no thought put into the creation of what could have been a very tasty treat. Considering my family use to own a small Chinese restaurant where I have spent many hours in mass production of the won ton, yes it is safe to call me a won ton expert. I’ll have it put in bold print on my new business cards. At first I didn’t think enough of them were given, but the more I ate the more I wanted to trade them in for those brightly colored pink seafood things. The meal cost me a little over $7.00. Now $7.00 still puts you in the cheap food catacgory, but when it resembles that of a .25 cents top ramen pack it starts to look a little pricey. If you want my advice, go to the grocery store and buy some green tea and head to the nearest sauna.

Directions to Naniwa Ya Ramen