Cruising down Waikiki can be a bit overwhelming. Big name brand shops here, restaurant there, little Asians passing out fliers over there, and more tourist shops here. It’s so much to take in, even for the natives, which is probably why they don’t come to this part of the island, that and they have this idea that we’re taking all their land. I’ve been living in Waikiki for a year now and I’m still uncovering hidden treasures tucked down lonely streets and buried between sky high buildings. There’s a ton of them just waiting to be explored so keep an open eye. I spotted Arancino while strolling through the chaotic streets of Waikiki. I made a turn down a quite road trying to get away from all the commotion and I came upon Arancinos.

Arancino’s is a quaint little eatery. What you see here is all there is, just two small rows of tables. We came here for lunch and as you can see they weren’t very busy.

We started off with a modest loaf of bread. The rosemary on top gives off the illusion of a fresh loaf of bread filled with herbs. It’s an illusion, rosemary was just sprinkled on top, I didn’t taste any herbs here. Ray and I have this one basket rule when it comes to bread but this time I broke it because as you can see, one basket isn’t very much. Ray hated the bread, said it was as boring as bread can be. I didn’t mind it so much with the olive oil and balsamic vinegar.

Glancing over the menu I realized that this was one of those places that look small, cute and inviting, but is actually small, cute, inviting and not so cheap. Well that sucks because I really wanted to like this place and wanted to come back. But I guess I should of known, after-all, it’s still Waikiki right? Oh bother, let’s see what to order to fill us up without raping a hole in my wallet. Ah, here we go, The Margherita Pizza, which is just a fancy way of saying margarita pizza. The menu said it was fresh mozzarella, basil, and homemade tomato sauce, $14.25. I have tasted many margarita pizzas in my time to know that this is a sorry embarrassing example of a margarita pizza. I mean, I know the menu said, mozzarella, basil and tomato sauce, but what about the tomato slice on each piece of pizza, and look at the skimpy amount of tomato sauce, and cheese, and basil. You know those pathetic mini frozen pizzas you get at the grocery store for around $1.79 on sale, those were a million times more exciting than the one you see here. Actually those are fucking amazing when you’re a little buzzed and you’re at home watching a game and drinking beer, I know some of you can relate. Anyhow, Ray and I got to talking and it wouldn’t have taken much to make this pizza a little bit more pleasing. This is what I suggest. Cut up slices of tomato and put one slice on each piece of pizza, add a bit more tomato sauce and cheese, chop up some basil so you get to taste the fresh herb with every other bite and also leave the whole ones for garnish in the center. There you have it, a thousand times better than that sorry piece of shit you guys call a margarita pizza.

If your in Waikiki and you want pizza don’t come here. Take your money to California Pizza Kitchen about 3 blocks away. I usually don’t support corporate places but at least they know what the fuck is going on. But if you do want Italian, just not pizza and you have the cash to burn stay at Arancino and check it out. The place is adorable, the menu looked mouthwatering and service was done with a smile. Happy eating to you.

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Arancino Pizza and Pasta
255 Beach Walk
Honolulu, HI 96815

Get Directions(808) 923-5557

You know, every so often when the moon is full, the stars are bright and all the planets are perfectly align I feel like being treated to a nice dinner. I had never heard of Tanaka of Tokyo before. Shane said it was like a Benihana’s in the sense that it’s totally table side service and all the food is prepared right there in front of you.

Luckily Ray was smart enough to make reservations. There was a small wait when we got there and then we were escorted to the inner cavity of the restaurant where I all the action went down. It was like we went straight to an underground gambling casino. The place was dark with not a lot of decor on the walls just a bunch of Asians sitting around a large round table, waiting to be dealt out some serious food. The chef puts on a show deals out the food and then, next round of food, deals it out and so on. There were lots of Asians, and commotion going on. Yeah, like I said, It definitely felt like we just stepped into a secret underground casino. How exciting is that.

Everyone is started off with a salad. I suggest you ask for the dressing on the side. No dressing is better than whatever it is that they are using. Even I, the salad whore, could not eat this, pat-tuey. I also ordered a tropical drink, to the right of my salad. It comes with the glass but no worries, a clean one is given to you at the end of the meal so you don’t have to take home a dirty one. Cheers!

This was our chef. Since this was table side service putting on a big show and making your guest laugh is key.

The food, the food, the food is on fire, we don’t give a fuck let the mother fucker burn, burn . . . Just having a little fun.

I don’t remembered exactly what we ordered but I can tell you it was two combination seafood deals at about $40.00-$50.00 each. So this is how it went down, were sat at a round table with strangers. You can make nice with them or ignore them, either way, your sitting with them. We threw everyone a smile and nodded to let them know we were friendly but for the most part we ignored them and they ignored us, this is probably due to the fact that we don’t speak Japanese and like all Japanese they pretend not to speak English. Waiter comes by to takes everyone’s order. Since I’m so use to sharing I was like, “we’ll order this now and if were still hungry we’ll get more later. ” “Uh, yeah, it’s not sushi honey, you have to order everything now,” Ray informs me. He was right, you have to order everything at once, the chef then is given the list and collects all his raw materials in the back, brings it to the table, then kindly introduces himself. When the chef returns everybody shuts the fuck up because we know at places like this it’s more about the show than it is about the food.

Everyone must of ordered the same damn thing because everything our master teppan-yaki chef prepared was dealt out to everyone. He better not be giving our food to everybody else, and if he is he better give us some of their food because sharing is caring bitches. I don’t care if you have a chef knife in your hand I will Shang-hi your ass.

At the end of the meal we were given a choice of green tea, vanilla or chocolate ice-cream to choose from. I got green tea and my honey got vanilla. The green tea was definitely better than the vanilla but my honey begged to differ, which was fine because I didn’t want to share any of it. Overall I am quite pleased with my experience here. The chef was skillful at presenting the food with great flair. Sometimes it’s wise to throw the cheap card out the door.

I forgot to mention that at the beginning of dinner a photographer comes over to the table and takes group photos of everyone. “What the fuck, I’m role playing here and I don’t want evidence of me up in a secret underground casino you dumb fuck, what do you think this is Disney Land? Fuck off,” I gave the photographer my best poker face and kindly took the photo anyway. At the end of dinner he comes back and distributes the freshly developed photos to each group. As he handed me our photo I did what any respected cheap ass would of done if they were in my shoes, I whipped out my camera with a quickness and with the skill of a nimble ninja took a photo of a photo. That’s right bitches, I still had my cheap card the whole time.

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Tanaka of Tokyo
131 Kaiulani Ave
Honolulu, HI 96815

Get Directions(808) 922-4233

Being at the Chart House made me feel as though I were in an old folks community in Florida. I’ve been to Florida once, it was actually the first state I stepped my little foot on. The family that adopted my family over from China are from Florida. I don’t remember the state much but it’s rummer that all old people go there to get away from us youngins. Life starts after 80 and it starts in Florida because it’s a geriatric haven there and here at the Chart House.

See what I mean, nothing but old people, everywhere, and not just old people, but rich old people. They sat us in the cocktail area, right next to a table of four, crazy old ladies day out. Watch out girls gone wild because these ladies were drinking and they were looking for a good time. But it was really uncomfortable because we were trapped in a corner table. The back of my chair was pinned up against another lady’s chair and every time I felt the urge to relax and lean back I hesitated because my back would rub up against hers.

Every time I go to a seafood place by the pier I can’t help but the get the urge to order clam chowder. I feel like if I love the clam chowder, I will more than likely love what’s coming next and if the clam chowder sucks dick cheese then chances are it will taste like dick cheese. The clam chowder cost $4.95 and sucked donkey dick. Great, check please! I didn’t get to taste a clam until I got half way through my soup. I didn’t really care for the flavor much, the potatoes were super mushy, and it looked a bit green, like celery chowder.

For appetizer we got the Hot Sampler, $18.95. It consists of cried chicken wings, fried zucchini, oyster rockefeller and calamari.

They oysters here were delicious, but this sauce they put with it was nasty as hell. It was super heavy, creamy and didn’t mix well with anything in your stomach.

These were the fried calamari and I didn’t care for them much either. The lady next to us seemed to take a liking to these though.

My favorite of the samplers were the fried zucchinis. The were delicious and cut the perfect width to where you get a proper amount of meat in each bite and it was cooked just right, not too mushy or raw. The grated parmeseam cheese on top was a nice touch.

I don’t know why we chose to order more but we did and we really shouldn’t have. This here is the Salmon Linguine, $10.95. As if the fried sampler platter didn’t make us feel like fat bastards enough; this plate really put us over the top. As you can see they didn’t put much care into the presentation of this dish at all. The bottom side of my dish was just bare dry noodles.

I think they cut up the salmon because it gives off the allusion that your getting more salmon than you think. I didn’t mind this because it guaranteed bits of salmon in every bite. The sauce was super rich, creamy and buttery in an instant heart attack kind of way.

Not a bad view during sunset.

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Chart House
1765 Ala Moana Blvd # 2
Honolulu, HI 96815

Get Directions(808) 941-6669