Drum roll please. The winner for the Soup Nazi Award goes to . . . . . . . . . . . . The Green Door Cafe. The first time I got to experience her service was last year when her business was located in China Town. After the Chinese New Year parade we walked into the Green Door, because every other business around was jam packed. She was standing outside, not ready to greet us but ready to send us away, “are you guys sure you want to eat here? You didn’t see all the food stands out there?” We tell her we’re sure so she reluctantly seats us. When we finally decide what we want to eat, I politely say, “o.k. were ready to order,” as she walks by. She walks right past me like she didn’t even hear me. I’m thinking, maybe she didn’t hear me. Her tiny restaurantz is packed. At the time there were maybe 6 tables; it was a small place. I look around and realize that every table, but one or two, is in need of something, ready to order, water, napkins, wanting to pay, etc. and she is at the door in what looks like pajama pants, nonchalantly talking to someone at the door. When she’s done conversing she walks past me again, by this time we’re totally ready to order so I say a bit louder this time, “we’re ready to order.” She looks at me, and keeps on walking. Ray and Shane just laugh at me. Wow, she really was just ignoring me. So, when we finally get around to ordering, she tells us, “no, that’s not what you want, I’ll give you the fish instead.” Doesn’t ask, but tells us we don’t want what we just ordered and we’re getting the fish instead. Okay, I guess we’re getting the fish. This lady is my hero. I’m telling you the lady that owns this restaurant is famous for her brusque manorism. Another table comes in and there’s no place to seat so she takes them to our table and seat them there without asking either party if it was alright. Luckily they we’re good company. Anyhow, the food was just as incredible this time as it was back then. We actually wanted to eat at the Olive Tree this night but it was packed so we walked next door to the Green Door Cafe instead.

The new location is a lot bigger.

After skimming the menu, I was ready to order but notice the sign at the counter, “self service please order your food here,”

And right next to that sign was the infamous Soup Nazi. It was like she was too good to get up and walk to the tables and serve people. I got up to give her my order and she was seriously eating her food as she took my order, didn’t even hesitate to stop. She just kept on shoveling food in her mouth and chewing, my hero in action. I was mesmerized. While waiting for our food, we couldn’t take our eyes off of her. She took everyone’s order the same way, didn’t skip a beat, kept right on chewing.

Ordering the flat bread here is a MUST, $1.50 each. It ties in the meal perfectly and goes with everything. I comes out fresh and hot. I haven’t been able to find bread like it anywhere else on the island.

This is the Organic Mushroom Chicken and Black Pepper with Garlic Wine Sauce, $13.75. I know it looks a bit overloaded with black pepper but it didn’t taste that way at all. The mushrooms were delectable and the dish as a whole was just superb. I loved, loved it.

Who’s not a curry fan? Everybody who loves curry right? The Malaysian Chicken Curry here is complete with flavor; a truly exceptional dish. The only thing that could of made it better was the flat bread. I filled my flat bread up with curry and folded it over like a taco, orgasmic, like a love explosion in my mouth.

The Green Door Cafe is the kind of place where dealing with the service is worth the food because no matter what you order it’s guaranteed to be phenomenal. If your not a fan of Eastern Food come for the service. I’m not gonna guarantee you’ll see Soup Nazi in action but it’s possible. After my first experience at The Green Door I shared my story with a few friends and they had a story to shoot right back at me. I also mentioned her once before in one of my recent post on Cafe VIII 1/2 and I got this comment back from Ken,

“Regarding Green Door in China Town, well, the same owner opened up shop in Kahala Mall. That lady is on another level! Were to start with my dining experiment there…
(1) Some places don’t have a liquor license, right? That’s usually cool, I actually prefer it so I can bring my own. Green Door hits you with a $3/head corkage fee, yet they don’t have a liquor license…WTF
(2) God forbid it is a busy night cause that owner refuses to hire any extra help. The whole time she was running the show and boy did she seem pissed off. A smile now and then goes a long way.
Lastley,
(3) I get a hardcore elbow to the back of the head as she is rushing in between tables, NO APOLOGIES!!!

However, the food was good… go figure.”

She’s infamous I tell ya. Fuck the food, come for the service.

After our first experience with the soup nazi we were so flabbergasted that our friend Shane had to take a photo with her.

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Green Door Cafe
1145 Maunakea St
Honolulu, HI 96817

Get Directions(808) 533-0606

Every time we drive by I’m like, let’s go there soon. I really want to check it out. Ray cringes, and pretends he doesn’t hear me. St. Louis Drive In sits at the corner of Waialae and 3rd Ave. and is pretty easy to miss since it’s so small. The place looks a bit tore up from the floor up; the kinda place that you should mentally and physically prepare yourself for, you know, with meditation, yoga, and tums, lots of tums. This draws me for some reason.

Hey, no worries, no dress code here.

Ray ordered the Mahi Sandwich, $6.55. It looks really good, yet really weird, is that a pancake in his sandwich? After poking and observing a bit more I discover that the fish is battered with pancake mix. Did they run out of regular batter or are they trying to be innovative? A drive in being innovative? Could happen. I’m not saying the next top chef works here, but maybe it’s grandma’s secret recipe. The sandwich was alright. The batter was good at first bite but then the fish just seemed limpy, and mushy. I felt like the pancake around the fish just acted as a sponge and soaked up the grease from the grill.

I ordered the Beef Stew, $5.95. It came with two scoops of rice and a small mac salad. The rice was horrible, hard some spots and mushy other spots. The stew was atrocious, definitely left overs, probably from early that month. It wasn’t very hot, hell, it wasn’t even warm. I got one half of a potato. It was as though someone got lazy and decided to cut the potato in halves to save time, instead of pieces. The beef was the worst part though. When you think of beef stew, you think of slow roasted, super tender meat right? At least I do. The beef was like jerky. No joke. It was so tough that when I took a bite some of it managed to get stuck between the walls of my teeth. At first I was hugely disappointed with the amount of meat I got but after taking a bite, I realized it was plenty because I couldn’t find it in myself to eat any more. Yep, this definitely gets the award for Worst Beef Stew Ever Made.

“You happy now?” Ray says with a sarcastic tone. He shakes his head, and just looks at me. It’s so fucking annoying because I know what he’s thinking, that this was exactly the reason why he doesn’t like coming to places like this, because the food sucks salty donkey dick cheese. But he doesn’t say much more because he knows I wouldn’t hesitate to smash my beef stew in his face. After eating we rush home because Ray has a weak stomach and his asshole needs to throw-up. I slide open the door while he’s on the shitter and that’s when I say, “I’m happy now babe.”

I do want to add that service was friendly and prices was super cheap. They have daily specials, student specials, and grape juice. Some items I found on the menu that are super duper cheap are grill cheese - $1.45, tuna sandwich - $1.75, 3 pancakes - $3.30, loco moco - $4.80. Because of it’s cheap prices I support this place, just do yoga one hour before you come, tums are optional.

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St Louis Drive In
3145 Waialae Ave
Honolulu, HI 96816

Get Directions(808) 734-3673

Driving through the Haleiwa you’ll find a strip of famous shops and eateries. It’s a tourist haven and I don’t mean that in a bad way. There’s a ton of famous eateries here, like Cholos, Matsumoto Shaved Ice, Haleiwa’s Joes, Rosie’s Cantina, Spagettini, and Haleiwa Eats. Everytime we drive by I’m like, let’s eat there, but I usually get overruled and we end up getting Mexican. It’s not so bad because tacos after a day at the beach is pretty fucking phenomenal. Anyhow, today I got my way and I finally got to check out Haleiwa Eats for myself.

I walked in and was super excited, this place is totally adorable.

On the wall behind me was a decorative display of Mac Computers. Since I’m Mac 4 life I could totally appreciate the art here. My younger sisters actually had one of these, the blue one. What a great innovative, and creative way to recycle Macs.

Here, we have the Thai Summer Rolls, $5.00, fresh rice paper wrapped with veggies and served with peanut sauce. This was a vegetarian’s dream summer roll. I’m use to summer rolls with some kind of meat like, shrimp or shredded pork, but these babies were meatless. Veggies like green beans and cucumbers that I love, but am not use to seeing in a summer roll was used. The peanut sauce made me nut myself, if you know what I mean. It was different than any other peanut sauce I’ve had, like a creamy, curry, peanut your mouth kind of sauce. Fan.

I believe this is the Thai Spicy Basil, $9.00, chili basil sauce, with string beans, zuchinni and onions. The portion was kinda skimpy, but it was no doubt delicious.

After eating the summer rolls and ordering some steam rice, I had just enough to eat to satisfy my hunger and curiosity. I left with a very happy belly.

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Haleiwa Eats
66-079 Kamehameha Hwy
Haleiwa, HI 96712

Get Directions(808) 637-4247